Robins Revenge Army
by Stephy-Lou Clark-Weasley
Summary: a group of insane fangirls travel back in time to do insane things. first chapter AU. others cannon with series 3. expect insanity, violence and friendship. oh and scared Outlaws. dicontinued, permanently.
1. The Beginning of the RRA

**Happy birthday socksycherry and paula545. This is your birthday present and part of the post – a – thon. **

It was a quiet day in the outlaw camp, Robin was sulking, Much was cooking squirrels, Allan was imagining what life would be like when Gisbourne and the sheriff is gone, John was play fighting with Djaq and Will was carving.

All of the sudden a mechanic sound came and a purple box materialized. The door opened and a girl with wild brown hair and glasses came out. She scanned her surroundings and grinned.

"See I told you I could get us here" she said

"Yeah, but the last time you said that we landed in 1665. And personally I don't want the plague" snapped another girl.

All of the sudden seven more girls came out. All wearing jeans and tops.

They saw the gang and squealed.

"OH MY GOD IT'S MUCH! WILL YOU COOK ME COOKIES!" shouted one of them.

"Err…. I'm making squirrel right now."

"Ha! I told you he cooks the squirrels" said the first girl that came out of the mysterious purple box.

"It's not fair, you're supposed to not cook them" the girl said to Much.

"err…. Not being funny but who are you?" Allan asked

Two girls squealed.

The first girl coughed loudly and they quickly stopped. "right, I'm Lady Clark, this one with the obsession of Much is deanparker, and the two girls squealing over Allan are zebrablonde and Mira. This here drooling over the picture is Paula, these two staring at Will are soapy-liedown and socksycherry. And last but not least this is little white fox"

"what strange names you have" John commented

Lady Clark shrugged "we're strange people" she said "now we're here for a purpose"

"we want you -" deanparker started

"- to sit back -" Paula continued

"– and relax. While we -" zebrablonde interrupted

"– give Gisbourne a sex change" Lady Clark finished.

"hang on I thought we were going to dress him in drag" Mira said

"really I thought we were going to do target practice on him" little white fox muttered

"nah it was the forcing him to do our school work" soapy – liedown said

The girls soon got into an argument that involved chocolate sauce, whipped cream, Allan, Will, a guy named Stephen, another two guys called Jack and David, and handcuffs"

"SILENCE!!!"" screamed John and Lady Clark.

"Right first thing first, how the hell did you get here?" Allan said

"We built a TARDIS" Paula said.

"Good thing it isn't pink" socksycherry muttered, the girls shivered at the idea.

"Aren't girls supposed to like pink?" Much whispered to Robin

"As we established before, we're aren't normal and that comment is sexist" Lady Clark snapped

"Big ears" deanparker coughed "and don't insult my Much"

The gang laughed as Much turned bright red.

"Two words" Lady Clark said "POT PLANT"

Soon Lady Clark was lying beneath seven girls.

"we swore not to talk about that day ever again" Paula hissed.

The gang edged away starting to feel scared.

Soon the girls got up and went off. The gang didn't see them till the next day after they found the Sheriff and Gisbourne tied to a tree looking like they're in drag.

"I can't believe you sent them to them" socksycherry hissed to Lady Clark

"I can't believe she actually did it" little white fox said looking rather ill.

"you didn't have to watch" Lady Clark said rolling her eyes.

After a long day of partying. (and in some cases snogging coughdeanparkerandmuchcough) the girls got into their purple box and flew off. The gang however had a huge headache from all of the arguing and screaming.

Meanwhile at the BBC:

_Dear BBC bastards_

_How dare you get rid off Marian and Rose. _

_However today we thought we give you a present to show our gratitude. _

_Love_

_Robin's revenge army_

_p.s: we've taken the actor's addresses, so there!_

The BBC writers looked around to see their offices in a mess they opened the box and immediately threw up.

Inside were Gisbourne and the Sheriff's family jewels so to speak.

Moral of the story don't get on Lady Clarks bad side (or any of the other girls mentioned in this story).


	2. The RRA Returns: To Clean Gizzy's Hair

It was a quiet afternoon; Much, Tuck and Kate were preparing dinner, Robin, Allan and Little John were discussing plans against the Sheriff when suddenly the quietness of the afternoon was disturbed by a mechanical sound. The grating of an engine, the wind was suddenly harsh and the men (apart from Tuck) looked at the materialising purple box in horror.

"Oh god no" Allan said. "Not them again"

"Who is it?" Tuck asked awed. "What is it? Something sent from god?"

"More like the devil" Allan muttered, shuddering at the memory of not so long ago.

The doors opened and suddenly they were surrounded by squealing girls who were tugging and pulling at them.

"Ooh Much I missed you soooooooooo much!" cooed one girl. "What's this I'm hearing about a crush on Kate?"

"What?!" Kate shouted looking horrified.

"YOU!" snarled the girl. "Hands off of Much, he's mine!"

"Well I don't want him" Kate replied hotly, irritated that some girl years younger than her has the nerve to boss her about her love life. "He's not my type"

"Oh you did not just say that" the girl shouted. "Much is _everyone's _type" Her fellow girls who were hanging off Allan and Robin exchanged glances that obviously said that Much was definitely not _their _type. The girl grabbed hold of the axe that was lazily left there by Allan and proceeded to chase Kate with it. "I'm going to kill you, you bitch!"

"Damn! I was hoping she was going to wait at least five minutes" a brunette said.

"Nuhuh not our Deannie" another brunette said smugly. "Now pay up"

The others sighed as they handed the smug brunette a chocolate bar each from their pocket, apart from the olive skinned girl who was hanging off of Allan, she was smart enough to not even bet on Deannie trying to kill Kate...it was inevitable. Instead she looked up at Allan while fluttering her eyelashes.

"You are so sexy when you act all tough" she purred.

"OI!" came a male voice from the box, the girls turned round to see a boy roughly their own age marching towards Allan. "Hands off of my girl!"

"What?!" Allan squeaked. "I haven't got my hands on her anywhere!"

"Jacob go away, you know I love you more than Allan anyway" the olive skinned girl snapped, rolling her eyes. "Besides why are you here? I thought we said this was a girls only trip"

"I wanted Allan to know that..." the rest of what Jacob was about to say was drowned out by a scream from the pretty dark-skinned girl with long black hair, actually when Allan thought about it she looked a lot like Djaq, must have come from the Holy Lands.

"BUT I WANTED TO SEE WILL AND DJAQ!" she wailed, the smug brunette looked sympathetic as she patted the girl's shoulder.

"There, there Zara, we can visit them after we visit Gizzy" she said soothingly.

"Y-you promise L.C?" Zara sniffled.

"Of course! We all want to see some Will/Djaq fluff" L.C exclaimed. "Though I'm pretty sure _someone _wants a chance to flirt with him as well"

"I just want a hug!" Zara protested blushing lightly.

"Come on!" shouted a blonde. "I want to see Guy!"

The other girls rolled their eyes and muttered under their breath as they began to trudge towards the blonde.

Deannie was still chasing after Kate.

"Shall we help the girls with their visit to Gisbourne or help Kate?" Tuck asked.

"Depends, do you want to be tortured for life or tortured for life?" Allan said dryly.

"Best if we stay out of it" Robin agreed. "These girls make the Sheriff look like St Nicholas"

RHRHRHRHRHRHRHRHRH

Guy of Gisbourne was attempting to take a nap when he suddenly felt crushed by a blonde who sat on top of him.

She wrinkled her nose. "Angst and depression doesn't become you love" she said.

"What?"

"Don't worry we're here to give you a hair cut and some guidance. While I'm pissed off that you killed Marian out of obsession I know you're truly a good guy" the blonde said softly cupping his face.

"What?!"

"Come on Cee stop flirting with the greasy git" L.C said walking in the room with a pair of scissors behind her was several girls that he didn't recognise and some that he did.

"YOU!" He roared. "You lot were the ones that tortured me not so long ago!"

"L.C! Mira! Paula! Zebbie! Soapy! Foxy! You promised you wouldn't!" Cee wailed looking furious.

"It was before we met you" Paula protested. "And L.C did most of it!"

"OI! Like you didn't help" L.C shouted.

"Why the hell are you here?" Guy demanded, a vein in his forehead twitching in fury.

"To give you a makeover, seriously you look like Professor Snape like that"

"Who?"

"Someone lend him Harry Potter" Mira ordered rolling her eyes.

Zara stepped forward clutching several books. "Here you go, you'll love them. I think Draco is the hottest"

The others eye rolled and L.C started a rant about someone called the Weasley Twins while the others sat Guy down and tied his feet to a chair. Guy sighed and began to read the first book; it was going to be a long afternoon.

RHRHRHRHRHRHRHRHRH

After several hours, Guy now stood wearing his old leathers with clean hair that was cut back to its original length and for some reason his nails were painted pink (L.C was trying her hardest to look innocent under Cee's glare). The insane girls were now giving him lectures.

"You should stand up more to the Sheriff, don't act like you're his pimp" Soapy said firmly.

"Stand up tall but don't look like you have a rod shoved up your behind it makes you unapproachable and if you want people to like you, you got to be approachable" Vicky said. "Also bathe regularly, you stank of stale ale when we got here"

"This means you had been drinking too much. Quit now because that is not an attractive trait in a man" Foxy said coolly.

"And you got to accept that you killed Marian, acceptance is the first step" Mira said wisely.

"What's the second step?" Guy asked nervously.

"How should I know? I'm only repeating what everyone says" Mira snapped.

"Also do you want to end up a lonely old greasy git with no friends, being constantly tortured by the man you're spying on while mourning for the woman you killed by accident or in this case because she loved your worst enemy more and spend the rest of your miserable existence looking after her kid while being a git to him?" L.C ranted.

Guy who had no had the chance to read the seventh Harry Potter book was confused. "Huh?"

The girls sighed in unison.

"Never mind" L.C muttered.

RHRHRHRHRHRHRH

The outlaws were relieved when the girls announced they were going to the Holy Lands to visit Will and Djaq. Kate especially due to that fact Deannie had chased her across Nottingham with an axe until her friends bribed her with chocolate...and Much.

"Take care, May you have a safe journey" Tuck said.

"With L.C driving? We're lucky to not have bruises" Soapy muttered rubbing her arm.

"Well you try driving a time machine and see how well you do!" L.C snapped crossing her arms defensively.

"I'll drive this time" Zara said firmly.

"NO!" the others shouted horrified.

"We might land on the queen and kill her...again" Zebbie said worriedly.

"Nah that was L.C and I believe it was the Human Doctor she killed" Paula said shaking her head.

"It was a fan fiction I wrote and technically Donna killed him!" L.C protested. "Now come on lets go before I have an urge to hang Gizzy by his balls"

"L.C!" Cee shrieked.

The outlaws were ever so relieved as the doors to the weird girls magical box slammed shut.


	3. The RRA Returns: To Tell Robin Off

"Oh good god no" Kate whispered horrified, dropping the wood she was carrying for the fire. "They're back, _she's _back"

And before anyone else could say another word, Kate ran far into the woods and probably towards the furthest town she can get to. The other outlaws stared at her enviously, none of them have the guts to do what she just did and now they're about to suffer the insanity or wrath of the Robin's Revenge Army.

The doors of the strange purple box opened and suddenly a crowd of roaring, furious, crazy girls wielding weapons charged at Robin and began to attack him.

"WHAT THE HELL?????" Robin shouted ducking and dodging each attack. "What have I done?!"

"You kissed Isabella!" L.C fumed. "So much for grieving for Marian, jeeze are you rebounding or something?"

"WHAT?!" the other outlaws shouted in shock.

"Robin, when did this happen?" Tuck asked.

"Yeah because I'm not being funny or anything mate but I thought you would have told us if you started courting some bird" Alan said while Much and Little John looked betrayed.

"I haven't!" Robin protested.

"It sort of hasn't happened yet" Paula admitted shiftily.

"Then how do you know if he has kissed her?" Tuck asked curiously. "Can you foresee the future?"

"Sweetheart we ARE the future" a new girl said sweetly.

"Scary future" Alan muttered under his breath.

"WHAT WAS THAT ALAN A DALE?!" Mira shrieked looking furious.

"N-nothing darling" Alan stuttered causing Much to snigger.

"Is it me or have you multiplied like bunnies or something?" Little John asked scratching his head as he counted the many teenage girls.

"Oh this is Josie, Voldy and Mysty they're all interested in Robin Hood, like us" Zebbie said introducing the new girls.

"However I think we should change it from Robin's Revenge to Marian's Revenge" Voldy said shooting a glare at Robin.

"What?! Then we have to be the MRA and that doesn't have much of a ring as the RRA" Foxy wailed.

"I agree RRA sounds better" Josie said nodding.

"Also we've been the RRA for well over a year" Cee added.

"Our year and half anniversary in two months!" Deannie shouted.

"Awwwwwwwwwwwwwwwww hugs!" the girls said in unison hugging one another, the men exchanged bewildered glances as the girls pulled away.

"Come on back to business after we punish Robin we got to punish Guy for being a scumbag and selling his own sister" Josie said in her best professional voice.

"Josie! You're bad as L.C!" Cee wailed looking distressed.

"Oi! I resent that!" L.C snapped. "I'm at least ten times worse"

The girls paused and thought about it.

The men also paused and remembered very vividly about the very first visit the RRA had given them.

Both groups murmured their agreements.

"Well come on then, CHARGE!" Deannie shouted taking control.

Alan, Tuck, Much and Little John stood aside and watched the insane girls carry Robin off for punishment.

RHRHRHRHRH

Robin, Kate and Gisbourne were all hanging upside down on the same tree. While Robin had a black eye and several bruises and Guy had a few cuts here and there as well as two black eyes neither of them were badly beaten up as Kate was. Poor Kate had also had her hair cut off by giant scissors and she was pretty sure she had a rib or two broken.

"How the hell did they get you?" Robin asked her.

"See that black watch thing over there" Kate said nodding to a bulky black metal thing similar to a timepiece sitting under a tree. "Cee was apparently going to use it to go back in time to warn Guy but Deannie snatched it and used it to catch up with me"

"She was the one that cut your hair?"

"Nah that was a pair of weirdos called Mysty and Voldy" Kate said shuddering.

None of them were aware of the Sheriff who had heard every word of the conversation and figured out that the black device could travel in time. None of them saw him use it and none of them saw him disappear.

RHRHRHRHRHRH

L.C was lounging in her bedroom writing fan fiction – err...i mean doing her history homework when a bright light caught her attention, she turned round to see the Sheriff and she let out a little groan.

"I knew they left the bloomin' vortex manipulator back there" she muttered. "What do you want? I'm in the middle of something very important"

The Sheriff smirked. "I merely want revenge for what you did to me last year" he picked up a broken globe from her floor (don't ask, it was world domination gone wrong) and used it to knock out the girl.

Picking her up and using the black device, the Sheriff set off back to his own time.

**To be continued in The RRA Returns: To Save L.C **


	4. The RRA Returns: To Save LC

The gang were having another peaceful, lazy afternoon, in fact it had been the tenth one in the row and they were beginning to wonder what the Sheriff was plotting. They were in the middle of discussing it when the familiar, terrifying sounds of an engine could be heard. They stood therein horror watching the purple box materialise, Kate gulped.

"Err...I'm going to visit my mother, be back later" she blurted out before running very fast, the men didn't blame her after the terrifying RRA visit last time Deannie and two other RRA girl's hacked her hair off.

The door opened with a bunch of girls dressed in trousers and black paint on their cheeks.

"Not being funny or anything but you look terrible" Alan said in his usual bluntness.

"If you must know we've just spent five days fighting weevils" Mira said coldly, which was unusual for the fan girl since she was usually all over Alan by now. "We got a problem"

"Yeah so?"

"It involves the Sheriff" Paula snarled, the other girls hissed darkly muttering swear words under their breath.

"What has he done?" Robin asked concerned, the girls seemed agitated and tense.

"He has kidnapped L.C!" Josie wailed. "It's all Cee's fault, she just had to try and save Guy when we're not looking and use Jack's vortex manipulator"

Cee glared at Josie. "Oh yeah and who was it that nicked it and used it to track Kate down?"

"Hey I said sorry!" Deannie protested. "Besides it was Voldy's and Mysty's fault for not reminding me that I dumped it under the tree"

"WHAT?!" the two sisters shouted in unison.

The girls burst out into a loud shouting match involving quite a few threats about men and chainsaws and pink nail polish. The outlaws watched terrified and awed; terrified with the threats these girls were coming out with (especially since some of them involved _them!_) and awed because it seemed without L.C they were even more scary and nuts, maybe they should save the girl because she was the only one who could tone them down?

"I want L.C!" Zara wailed over everyone's voices. "Who else is going to tear every guy to shreds and hang them by the testicles when they hurt us?"

On second thoughts maybe they should stay out of this rescue. The other girls sighed and looked down at the ground miserably.

"This is bad as the time Paula got kidnapped by Stephen" Zebbie muttered.

"Oh my god what if the Sheriff does something horrible to her?!" Foxy squealed looking panicked. "What if he tortures her?"

"Then she would go all Robin Hood on him and shoot him with a bow and arrow" Josie said soothingly as she patted Foxy's back.

"Erm...Josie have you ever seen L.C with a bow and arrow?" Soapy asked, her mouth twitching in amusement.

"She's most likely to aim for the Sheriff and get poor Robin here" Zebbie said giggling slightly while Robin frantically looked around himself for stray arrows.

"Zebbie's she's most likely to aim for the Sheriff and get herself" Deannie corrected.

"Oh come on she's not that bad!" Foxy protested.

Another argument broke out between the girls. The outlaws sighed heavily; it appeared that this was going to be a long afternoon.

RHRHRHRHRHRH

"Is it me or did we just managed to sneak in a hell lot easier than usual?" Alan asked his fellow outlaws.

"It's not just you, it seems that the guards are doing something else" Tuck said in his most serious voice. "I fear that they might be harming the Lady Clark"

"If so then we'll make them pay" Deannie growled her fist clenched so tightly round Much's hand that he let out a whimper.

"First we'll dye whatever hair he has left over fluorescent orange" Voldy whispered to her sister. "Then we shave his eyebrows off and paint rainbows to replace them"

Mysty nodded. "Of course and then we should give him fake nails and dress him in something hideous"

"I rather rip his nails off one by one" Cee muttered darkly cracking her fists.

The closer they got to the dungeon, the clearer they heard the high-pitched, feminine screaming that filled them all with dread.

"L.C!"

They ran towards the door and with all their strength poured together knocked the door down to see....

...the Sheriff topless while being strung on the rack. His chest covered in scars, bruises and burns while L.C, Isabella and Guy stood around him with similar smirks on their faces.

"Hiya!" L.C said waving to the others cheerfully. "What do you think? It used to be Isabella's" she spun round showing off the long elegant green dress.

"You're all right?"

"Not hurt are you?"

"Where did he touch because I'll tear it off of him?"

"Have you eaten?"

L.C stared at her friends in confusion; she blinked and then suddenly put her hands on her hips looking furious. "What the hell made you think I was a damsel in distress? All the fucking twat got to do was knock me out, the moment I woke up I got payback"

The girls sighed in relief before suddenly pulling L.C into a smothering group hug.

"Pooh! You stick Stephie" Josie said wrinkling her nose.

"You would too if you hadn't had a shower for ten days" L.C grumbled.

All the girls suddenly pulled away with looks of disgust.

"Shower?" Paula suggested. "TARDIS is full of them, and then we'll have a nice glass of diet coke and some chocolate"

"Paula you are a saint" L.C said gratefully as she allowed Paula to lead her out of the dungeon.

The moment L.C was out of hearing range the other RRA girls started their torture.

RHRHRHRHRHRH

The outlaws stood by Gisbourne and Isabella but refused to speak to either of them, Paula crouched by their feet as they surrounded the throne like chair that the Sheriff usually sat upon. Instead of the Sheriff sat a very amused, very giggling seventeen year old girl who was sharing out chocolate.

Something all the outlaws agreed on being heaven and begged the RRA to bring them more in the future.

Hanging by his feet before them was the Sheriff, his hair was an eye burning bright orange, rainbows replaced his eyebrows and he worse a strange outfit that was made of bright colours. The majority of the RRA were standing below him with large rounder bats and blindfolded.

"Piñata, piñata, piñata, piñata, piñata!" L.C and Paula chanted as they clapped their hands.

The girls began to beat the Sheriff with the bats.

"You know, I think this is the best holiday we ever had" Much said stretching his arms and grinning wickedly.

"Yeah, we should invite these girls more often" Robin agreed laughingly, he had forgiven the girls from beating him up about the kiss that hasn't happened yet after all they were right it hasn't been that long since Marian died and Isabella was his rival's little sister.

"Not unless you want to sleep in a bed made of wasps" Alan grumbled.

"Ooh that's a great idea" Paula squealed. "HEY GUYS LETS PUT A WASP HIVE IN VAYSEY'S BED!"

L.C turned a ghostly white colour and her hands clenched tightly onto the arms of the chair.

"L.C are you all right?" Much asked nervously, not wanting to get a kick or worse.

"W-w-w-w" L.C stuttered, she then shuddered. "WASPS???????? AAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!"

The whole of Nottingham's eardrums exploded.


	5. The RRA Returns: To Visit Will & Djaq

**Author's Note: this chapter is dedicated to Zara, whose birthday is very soon. Happy Birthday babes!**

"Holy Lands, Robin Hood time" L.C said as the engines slowed down to a stop. "I promise it's outside of these doors this time"

"You promise?" Zara asked looking up with her large puppy dog eyes. "Because if you landed us in another time zone I'll paint your room pink"

L.C shuddered. "How can something so cute and innocent be so evil?" she asked the ceiling.

"Because you influenced her" Deannie said smirking from her seat.

"Oh like you didn't have anything to do with it" L.C muttered under her breath.

Zara crossed her arms and pouted. "No one influenced me; I was already evil before I met you"

"Let's go out and meet Will and Djaq" Paula said quickly before another argument broke out. "Hopefully we won't end up on Pluto again"

"Or in another swamp" Zebbie muttered.

"Or in a plague infested town" Foxy staged whispered.

"Or in the bathroom while Dad's showering" Mysty murmured while she and her sister shuddered.

"Or in a woods with psycho killers" Soapy added.

L.C glared at her fellow sisters who took a cautious step away from her. "If you don't like my driving then you can drive instead"

"We would" Cee said with a sigh. "But you put a burglar alarm that sends axes flying at your head each time someone other than you touches the console"

L.C winced as she knew everyone had been a victim to her axe at least once in the past few weeks. "Sorry about that but I was worried that Jack Harkness would try something"

"The poor man is more scared of what you'll do to his family jewels to try anything simple as breathing" Mira muttered darkly. "Now come on let's go out and meet Will and Djaq!"

The others grumbled as they shuffled down the ramp towards the doors.

RHRHRHRHRHRHRHRHRH

Will stood frozen as he stared at the strange purple box that mysteriously appeared in the pigeon coup. He was pretty sure it wasn't there before when he turned round to feed some of the other pigeons. The doors opened and a small dark skinned girl that looked like a more feminine version of Djaq stepped out and let out a high pitched squeal before running into his chest and holding his waist tightly.

"Ohmygodohmygodohmygodohmygodohmygodohmygod" she squealed into his chest. "You're _gorgeous! _Absolutely gorgeous, even better looking in real life than TV" she pulled away and wrinkled her nose. "But you stink a bit"

"Oi! I do wash regularly, you know" Will said feeling insulted.

"Oh it's not your fault sweetie" the girl cooed. "It's this time period, no descent shower gel anywhere and only badly made soap"

"What's wrong with my soap?" a voice growled from behind them, Will and the girl turned to see Djaq standing by the door, her hair a couple more inches longer since the outlaws had been in the Holy Lands and her belly slightly bigger. "And why are you all over my husband?"

"Ohmygodohmygodohmygodohmygodohmygodohmygod" the girl squealed running over to Djaq and hugging her tightly. "I can't believe my ultimate favourite ship as actually gotten married and pregnant! I have died and gone to heaven"

Will and Djaq exchanged frightened and bewildered glances. "Erm...who are you exactly?" Will asked.

"I'm Zara and I am your biggest shipper!" Zara said giggling as she finally pulled away from Djaq. "Can I have your autographs? And a photo of you both together? And maybe kiss Will on the cheek?"

"What's an autograph and photo? And no way in hell will you put your pouty little lips near my man" Djaq growled.

"Ooh aren't you wonderfully jealous?!" Zara squealed a little star struck, she then paused and looked around her. "Hang on where are the RRA gone?"

"There's more of you?" Will groaned.

RHRHRHRHRHRHRHRHRHRHRH

The large group of girls sat round a table in the kitchen sipping cans of ice cold fizzy drinks.

"Blimey it was far too hot out there" Foxy moaned.

"I would have gotten sunburnt!" Vicky complained as she took another gulp of her drink.

"Let Zara have all the fun with Djaq, they'll probably end up sword fighting or something over Will" Zebbie muttered as she stared at her hand with fierce concentration. "Does anyone have a five?"

"Go fish" the others said in a monotone voice.

"Damn!"


	6. The RRA Returns: To Guide Kate

Kate paled and looked quickly side to side trying to find an escape route as the metal grinding sounds of the RRA TARDIS could be heard. She found none that would give her a quick escape and resigned herself to standing up against a tree holding a fallen branch as a weapon. The purple box finally materialised and the door opened as the large group of girls stood there grinning.

Kate couldn't help tremble; they were extremely terrifying and all seemed to hold some sort of grudge against her. Josie, Paula, L.C and Zebbie stepped forwards towards her causing her to lash out with the branch.

"Whoa..." Zebbie said holding her hands up. "We come in peace"

"We're not here to do anything bad to you promise" Josie said with a sweet smile that Kate wasn't sure she could trust.

"Kate it's all right, we're here to help you not hurt you" Paula said softly with concerned eyes.

"What about that Deannie girl? Can you promise that she won't hurt me?" Kate asked bitterly while shuddering.

"Kate I can definitely promise you that Deannie is far too busy to hurt you" L.C said in a false cheerful voice.

RHRHRHRHRHRHRH

Tvnut was lounging on the sofa with an ice cold can of diet coke and the latest magazine filled with Orlando Bloom pictures enjoying her peaceful time in the RRA headquarters without arguments and screaming and violence.

"LET ME OUT OF HERE!!!!!! GODDAMNIT IT L.C!!!!"

Unfortunately L.C had decided to lock Deannie in a cage this time, leaving Tvnut to play the unpaid zoo keeper.

"WHEN YOU GET BACK HERE I WILL KILL YOU!"

RHRHRHRHRHRHRHRH

L.C shuddered and looked terrified; Josie put a hand on her shoulder. "Are you all right L.C?" she asked concerned.

"I got this horrible sinking feeling that Deannie is plotting my death as we speak" L.C confessed.

"That's what you get when you lock her in a cage" Zebbie said rolling her eyes before both she and Paula looped their arms through Kate's. "Come on Kate we're going to have a nice girly chat inside"

Kate gulped as she was dragged by two very strong younger than her girls towards the purple box of doom...

RHRHRHRHRHRHRHRH

"Would you like something to drink? Or maybe a snack after all you probably been living on Much's roast squirrels for the past few months" Soapy offered Kate as she handed out a variety of drinks and snacks to her friends.

"No thank you" Kate said. "It's rather hard to eat something when you're tied to a chair"

"Yeah...sorry about that but we did it to satisfy some people's bloodthirsty needs" L.C said shooting a disapproved look at Voldy and Mysty who were suddenly looking angelic and waving innocently back. "Now anyway Kate we're here to discuss to you about your relationship with Robin"

"What about it?" Kate asked wearily certain that she knew where this was going.

"It's wrong, you shouldn't be with him. You should be with Allan" L.C said firmly.

"_Allan?" _Kate repeated shocked, horrified and slightly disturbed. She was actually expecting them to say Much.

"Yeah well the thing is-"

_They tried to make me go to rehab but I said 'no, no, no'  
Yes I've been black but when I come back you'll know, know, know  
I ain't got the time and if my daddy thinks I'm fine  
He's tried to make me go to rehab but I won't go, go, go_

Everyone turned to look at L.C, some of the RRA attempted to muffle their giggles as L.C began to play hunt the mobile in her handbag that happened to be hanging on the peg behind the door.

"Look I keep losing the bloody thing and hadn't had the chance to change the ringtone" L.C said defensively.

_I'd rather be at home with ray  
I ain't got seventy days  
Cause there's nothing  
there's nothing you can teach me  
that I can't learn from Mr Hathaway_

"Well why did you have it in the first place?" Cee asked looking amused.

"My Mum put it on" L.C muttered as she finally found the phone and answered it cutting off Amy Whinehouse's ....whinging. "Hello?"

"STEPHANIE LOUSIE CLARK YOU BETTER NOT BE TRYING TO GET ROBIN AND KATE SPLIT UP!!!!!"

Everyone in the whole room jumped a mile at the screech. "Erm....I'll sort this out you lot continue with the mission" L.C said to the others before leaving the room while trying to persuade 'Loz' that Kate and Allan are perfect for each other.

RHRHRHRHRHRHRHRH

"Right then, while really Allan is mine and mine alone" Mira said. "I'm giving him up to you only because Jacob wouldn't stop whinging and I need some peace"

Kate blinked.

"No one has told him that jealousy isn't an attractive trait in a man?" Josie asked swinging on her chair.

"I don't know...i kind of like his possessive side" Mira said dreamily causing the others to groan.

"Anyway both you and Allan think on the same frequency" Mysty said. "Most of your plans are very similar and you have very similar working attitudes"

"Also the sexual tension between you two when that tax collector locked you in the Butcher's was amazing" Paula added.

"I have to admit Allan would go to the end of the world and back for you" Foxy said thoughtfully. "He showed that when he 'rescued you' from that damn traitor when King Richard's so called body was brought back"

"That also shows that he's got a possessive side which means you're even more loved" Zebbie said.

"He also fancied you since the moment he met you and been fighting over you with Much" Soapy pointed out.

"And no offense...well actually take any offense I don't care but you and Robin aren't really that great together" Josie said. "It was completely and utterly out of character for Robin to return your feelings, it hurt Much who fancies you to death and also can anyone say rebound?"

"So if it hurts Much who fancies me why are you trying to set me up with Allan?" Kate asked confused.

"We're crazy not suicidal" Zara said. "Deannie would kill us if we tried to matchmake you with Much"

Everyone nodded in agreement.

"I say we should hypnotise Kate!" Voldy said pulling out a small watch on a chain.

"No...Bad things usually happen when we try to hypnotise people" Paula said firmly.

"Like what?"

"Let's just say it almost destroyed Cardiff" Zebbie said shuddering at the chaotic memories.

RHRHRHRHRHRHRH

It had been five hours and after getting sick and tired of hearing how perfect Allan would be for her Kate pretended to agree with them just to escape. She then got lost in the maze of corridors and ended up having one of the girls guide her back to the door....she definitely didn't like the look of her grin, made her think the girl was planning something evil. When she finally got back to the Outlaw camp everyone surrounded her and began to ask her questions, one after another.

"SILENCE!!!!"

The men shut up and waited for Kate to speak.

"Thank you, I'm fine, nothing bad happened neither Isabella or Guy tried anything" Kate answered some of the million questions she was asked. "I actually spent the whole day with the RRA"

The guys looked gobsmacked.

"And you came out unharmed?" Much asked scanning Kate for bruises or scratches.

"Deannie wasn't there and they just wanted to talk" Kate shrugged. "You know, when they're not being bloodthirsty they are very nice people and very amusing to listen to"

The men looked sceptical.


	7. The RRA Returns: To Marry Much Prt 1

It was a beautiful sunny day, the sun was shining brightly and the sky was a deep blue that reminded Robin of King Richard's sapphires that he had once seen. There was a little breeze that made the heat bearable and the Outlaws had chosen to enjoy the day with lazing round the camp. It was then when the peaceful silence was broken by the loud grinding of the familiar and occasionally horrific RRA TARDIS engine.

The moment the purple box appeared a girl that the Outlaws never saw before stepped out and gave a cheesy pose. "Never fear because Tvnut is here" she shouted while winking at Tuck.

"Err...who are you?" Robin asked.

"I'm Tvnut, the eldest RRA sister" Tvnut said holding her hand out to him. "I always stayed at the headquarters before but today is special and I get to come as well"

"Well...it's very nice to meet you" Robin said uncertainly as he shook Tvnut's hand, he winced slightly as her grip was probably a little too firm but kept a smile on his face.

The other girls poured out and were already hugging everyone apart from Deannie who was glaring at Kate (who was trying to hide behind Allan).

"So why is today so special that this lovely (and not homicidal) lady is here" Tuck asked curiously.

"Much and Deannie are getting married" Lolly informed the Outlaws giggling.

"WHAT?!" The Outlaws screamed shocked. "MUCH WHY DIDN'T YOU TELL US?!"

"I didn't exactly know either" Much said looking confused and rather pale.

"Do you have any problems with it?" Deannie asked glaring with her hands on her hips, the RRA standing behind her in the same stance and evil terrifying glare on their faces.

"N-n-no" Much stuttered as his knees almost gave in.

"Right then so we'll be arranging everything while you big strong men go help carry things and setting them up" Mira said fluttering her eyelashes at Allan, causing her boyfriend Jacob to cough.

"Remind me why he's here" Paula murmured to Zebbie.

"Because he's a guy thus an idiot" Zebbie grinned.

"Right everyone hut to it" Mira snapped causing everyone to salute her and click their ankles together as they straightened their posture.

"YES MA'AM!"

RHRHRHRHRHRHRHRHRH

The Outlaws were sweating heavily as they finished hulling the final picnic table out from the strange bigger on the inside purple box, built a small alter and a long table for food with the help of Jacob who was still glaring at Allan.

"Not being funny or anything but have I got something on my face?" Allan asked glaring back at Jacob.

"No unfortunately" the younger man grumbled before storming off.

Allan shook his head. "I still don't get it" he muttered to himself.

It was then when Zara skipped out throwing glitter and confetti all over the place, the skirt of her dress bounced round her knees as she cackled gleefully, Zebbie, Soapy, Paula and Josie followed with worried looks as they carried decorations.

"How much sugar did she eat behind our backs?" Josie whispered.

"I don't think she had any...i think the wedding hyped her up" Paula whispered back.

"As long as it doesn't turn out like the last time" Zebbie muttered shuddering while Zara shot them an innocent smile.

"I'm not sure whether or not to be scared" Soapy said.

"Come on you lot! We need the paper chains and fairy lights strung up in the trees now!" L.C ordered pulling out a very long extension lead.

"Hang on weren't you supposed to be cooking?" Soapy asked frowning.

"Soaps are you dying to have food poisoning?" Mysty asked stepping out with table clothes draped over her arm. "Or to have our kitchen burned down? Or maybe L.C blood flavoured cakes?"

"All right, all right they got the picture" L.C grumbled as she plugged in a plug causing the fairy lights in Paula's arms lit up.

"Whoa..." the Outlaws said awed and fascinated. They will never understand this magical devil like women who brought many fascinating things with them and yet scared the living shit out of all them.

"Where's everyone else?" Josie asked.

"Deannie and Mira are getting Deannie ready, Foxy, Lolly and Voldy are attempting to cook and Cee and Vicky are temporarily fighting with the Much to put on a tux" Mysty said thoughtfully. "I'll give Much two more minutes before getting bound and gagged"

"And Tvnut?" Soapy asked.

"Plotting something in the wine cellar...not sure what but I heard her muttering Tuck's name so...I'll be careful"

Tuck gulped while the other Outlaws looked sympathetic for him.

RHRHRHRHRHRHRHRH

Everything was perfect, the decorations looked wonderful, the food was un-burnt and the guests were all neatly dressed...the Outlaws uncomfortable in the suits that the RRA presented to them. Robin was still tugging his collar. However there was one major problem that Tuck spotted.

"Erm...who will be marrying the pair? I mean we don't have a priest" Tuck pointed out.

"Oh don't worry about that honey, L.C is going to do it" Tvnut said flirtatiously.

"WHAT?!" the Outlaws screamed.

"That woman is a priest?" John shouted.

"Jesus Christ Much is doomed" Robin muttered.

"Shh...It's starting" Mysty hissed glaring at the Outlaws as L.C came down the aisle dragging Much.

Shortly afterwards Deannie glided down the aisle in a long white dress, her hair loose and flowing down her back Mira and Cee following in matching blue dresses. They stopped in front of L.C and Deannie snatched up Much's hand.

"Dearly beloved we're gathered here today to celebrate the love between these two people" L.C said. "Do any of you have any objections?"

Much unsteadily raised a hand.

"Apart from the groom?"

Much's hand drooped and the other Outlaws were too terrified to say anything.

"Deannie Parker do you take this idiot to be your lawful husband?" L.C asked ignoring Deannie's glare and Much's squeak of indignation. "To love and cherish? To honour and disobey? To boss about and be rude to?"

"Hang on isn't it supposed to be honour and obey?" Allan whispered to John.

"When do those girls obey anyone?" John asked.

"Good point"

"I do" Deannie said loudly and sincerely as she gazed lovingly at Much.

"And do you Much take Deannie to be your lawful wife?" L.C asked turning to the petrified man. "To love and cherish? To honour and obey? To worship and do everything she demands? To be basically her slave in everything?"

"I-I-I" Much stuttered. Suddenly several loud clicks could be heard and he turned to see the whole RRA holding guns up at him, he let out a squeal of terror and turned round. "I DO!" he shouted.

The girls snickered, the guns didn't actually have bullets in just paint but what Much didn't know wouldn't hurt him.

"Then I pronounce you man and wife you may kiss the bride" L.C said grinning as Deannie pulled Much down to her and started to kiss his lights out. "Now let's go and party!"

"I got the wine!" Tvnut shouted holding a green glass bottle up in the air....

**To be continued in the second part...**


	8. The RRA Returns: To Marry Much Prt 2

Now Much was enslaved...err...married to Deannie, everyone was happy to celebrate. Due to the extension leads L.C has prepared Cee was able to play music varying from bands like Snow Patrol to singers like Britney Spears all the way to Disney songs that the whole RRA sang cheerfully along with.

While the Outlaws were amazed with the music they were also a little scared with the singing, especially when Tvnut began to get drunk and slurred her words.

Deannie had pulled Much onto the 'dance floor' and held on to him tightly as she swayed her hips, Much unsure what to do just stepped forwards and backwards while placing his hands on his new wife's waist. Little John was being forced to dance by both Zebbie and Paula while Soapy and Josie were dancing with Robin. Voldy, L.C, Mysty, Lolly, Zara and Vicky were dancing together while also chatting to Cee who was guarding the CD-player just in case someone decided to play something horrific like High School Musical.

Mira had edged closer to Allan and was now looking up at him with a hopeful look. "Allan will you dance with me?" she asked.

"Err...sure" Allan shrugged.

Mira grabbed his hand and was half-way near the dance floor when Jacob appeared looking so furious that Allan swore he saw steam coming out of the boy's ears.

"What are you doing with my girlfriend?" Jacob demanded.

"Just dancing" Allan said glaring at Jacob.

"Well don't, I don't want your slimy hands on her. Who knows where they have been?"

"Jacob I think I can decide who I want to dance with!" Mira snapped.

"Look mate I'm not being funny but it's just a dance so get over it"

"It's not just a dance when you're putting your hands all over her arse!"

"What?! I wouldn't do-"

"Or you're trying to lean in for a kiss"

"Mate you're in-"

"Or your arm draped round her shoulders"

"I'm not a per-"

"Or you're planning to dr-"

"SUPER L.C PUNCH!"

Suddenly both men were thrown against two trees by two well aimed punches from...puppets? One was shaped as a bear and another shaped as a rabbit, L.C standing there looking rather smug.

The others stood staring at the puppets.

"What's with those puppets?" Josie asked raising an eyebrow.

"I got the idea from an anime I was watching earlier" L.C shrugged passing the puppets to Zara who was now threatening to punch Robin with them.

If this was an anime everyone probably would have sweat dropped.

"We seriously got to stop her watching anime" Jacob whined rubbing his head. "She keeps getting these horrible ideas"

"They're not so bad" Paula said defensively, she had enjoyed some of the ideas that L.C had come up with.

"I dunno...the evil teddy army might have been an extreme" Foxy said thoughtfully.

"But they're so cute!!!!!" L.C, Zara, Voldy and Mysty chorused together.

"Yeah they are" Josie admitted.

"What I don't understand is how she managed to bring them alive" Lolly muttered.

The Outlaws decided that the food was safer than discussing L.C's scary and insane antics.

RHRHRHRHRHRHRHRHRH

Robin stood up nervously holding a piece of paper he was given by a sniggering Paula. He coughed loudly and everyone quietened down and paused to look at him, Foxy looked wishfully at her plate of food hoping whatever was going on won't take so long so were a mixture of RRA girls and Outlaws.

"Erm....i looked up on the internet – what's an internet?" Robin asked looking up from the piece of paper he was reading from, the Outlaws shrugged while the girls muttered never mind and rolled their eyes. "And apparently the Best Man speech is supposed to be as long as the groom makes love to his bride, so knowing Much that means I should have finished two minutes ago"

The RRA girls and Allan almost fell out of their seats in hysterical laughter while Much looked embarrassed and Deannie looked furious. Little John looked disgusted and for some reason Tuck was missing. Kate was also missing but that was mostly due to the fact she decided to keep a look out in the forest in case of Isabella and her cronies decided to gatecrash (or so she said the Outlaws expected it was more to do with the fact Voldy and Mysty had an evil glint in their eye when they saw her).

"Right my turn!" Mira said jumping up.

"What? No I wanted to say something!" Cee said jumping up.

"So did we!" L.C, Paula, Zebbie, Josie, Soapy, Voldy, Foxy, Vicky, Mysty and Lolly snapped getting out of their chairs.

"Bubbles" Zara said blowing bubbles.

"Oooooooook" Allan muttered edging away from Zara.

"Hey where's Tvnut?" L.C asked looking around the area.

"No idea" Lolly said scanning the area. "Last I saw of her was when we were dancing, she was drinking out of that bottle of wine and chatting to Tuck"

"You don't think Isabella or Guy got them do you?" John asked worriedly.

"Better not or they'll regret it" Mira growled while the others muttered in agreement pulling out weapons from their pockets.

Robin's eyes widened in alarm as Soapy who was the nearest pulled out a pocket knife. "Do you all have weapons?!"

"Hey if you think we're bad you don't want to know what L.C is carrying" Josie said, the Outlaws turned to L.C looking horrified, L.C merely smiled innocently.

"Come on lets find Tvnut and Tuck" Paula said herding everyone away from the party area.

"Just don't hurt Guy!" Cee shouted causing everyone to groan.

RHRHRHRHRHRHRHRH

They found them behind a bush, much to everyone's amusement and horror the pair were curled up in one another's arms knocked out due to the large amount of alcohol they had drunk. Tvnut's clothes and hair were ruffled and tangled up while Tuck's whole face was covered in red kiss marks from Tvnut's lipstick. Robin had carried Tvnut back to the TARDIS with L.C leading while John half dragged, half carried Tuck who was waking.

"Father forgive me for I have sinned" Tuck slurred.

"Yeah tell me about it you kinky monk" John muttered under his breath.

"I guess we better get going" Soapy said as several of her sisters started taking all the electrical goods down and putting them away in the TARDIS. "Tvnut was supposed to be going to a lecture tomorrow, god knows how she's going to managed it with the hangover she's gonna get"

"Serves her right from drinking" Lolly muttered.

"Also time for the honeymoon" Deannie said blushing slightly.

"Honeymoon?!" the Outlaws yelped.

"I'm not going anywhere!" Much shouted due to the horrible gut feeling that a honeymoon involved leaving Nottingham.

"ZAZZY ULTIMATE PUNCH" Zara shouted punching Much with both hands with the puppets L.C had given her. The poor man was knocked out and Paula, Zebbie, Voldy, Mysty, Josie and Mira picked him up and carried him into the TARDIS.

"We'll give him back soon" Vicky shouted.

"What?! I'll never give him up!" Deannie shrieked.

"Goodbye" Jacob muttered as he, Cee and L.C followed. Zara was giggling hysterically as she wandered off.

The doors slammed shut and the purple box vanished.

"We're never going to see him again are we?" Robin asked the others.

"No" John and Allan answered looking shocked and terrified.

Then Tuck puked all over their feet.


	9. The RRA Returns: To Torment Prince John

It was a peaceful night and Prince John was sleeping like a baby in his soft gooses' feathered stuffed mattress and pillows and cotton blankets. His bed was surrounded by royal red velvet curtains and there was nothing but sweet dreams of being king in his mind. Prince John was always a sensitive sleeper so when his bed seem to sink under a new weight, he already began to stir.

"Jooooooooooooooooooohn" a ghostly whisper sang. "Oh Johnny boy..." he stirred even more but the ghostly whisper had no patience. "L.C CHOP!" John's eyes flew open when a paper book hit him hard on the head.

"L.C chop?" a female voice asked.

"Eh I got the idea of an anime"

"Do you do nothing but watch anime?" another female voice asked.

"It's brilliant! some of the characters can get really violent and I get wonderful ideas" the brunette sitting on Prince John argued, Prince John was getting agitated not only was his beauty sleep being disturbed but some commoner was squishing his legs badly. "Oh look he's awake" the brunette said grinning.

"Let me at him! I want to destroy his pretty pussy cat face and make him wish he was never born!" a different female voice growled causing Prince John to whimper.

"Hold on you lot can do physical torture in a minute" L.C promised. "But I want to read this to him first" she held up a purple covered book with a picture of a fancy dressed man leering at a bodiless head while saying the words 'that'll teach you to make lumpy custard' above in a golden framed box were the was the title **Cruel Kings and Mean Queens by Terry Deary. **"Hem, hem John the First reined between 1199-1216"

"I finally become king? And for seventeen years!" Prince John cried out happily, his face looking like a child on Christmas day.

"Oh great you made him happy"

"I'll get to it in a minute Mysty keep your wig on" L.C said rolling her eyes. "John the First was the worst kings to ever rule England, he was forced to give all power to the barons and argued with the pope, closed all the churches thus upsetting monks who wrote his history telling everyone not to love him!"

"NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!" Prince John screamed in agony.

The other members stared at him.

"What an idiot" Deannie muttered reading over L.C's shoulder. "Says here he lost the crown jewels in a river"

"NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!"

Everyone clapped hands over theirs ears.

"Someone shut him up, I think my eardrums just burst" Lolly complained.

"Don't you people love me?" Prince John asked grabbing hold of Paula.

"No!" Paula said struggling to get out of Prince John's vice like grip.

"But I'm beautiful, love me!"

"Help!"

It took both Zebbie and Soapy to pull Paula out of Prince John's embrace, all three landed on the floor in a tangle mess.

"Right, that's it we're going to sort you out for once and for all" Mira snarled cracking her knuckles.

Prince John whimpered. "Where the hell are my guards?!" he shouted looking side to side hoping his well armed guards will spring out of no where to defend their beloved soon to be king.

"Zara and Foxy are keeping them....entertained" Cee said smirking.

RHRHRHRHRHRHRHRH

The guards were sweating nervously as they met the gaze of the fake innocent look in the exotic woman from the holy lands eyes and the bored look in the brunette's eyes. Both were incredibly fearsome and one wrong move might kill them all....

"Err...any threes?"

"Go fish" Foxy said flatly.

"NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!"

"Goddamnit it man!"

"How the hell are we supposed to win if you keep asking for threes?"

"You are so going to sleep outside tonight!"

RHRHRHRHRHRHRHRH

The next morning the exhausted guards and the bishop from Prince John's church knocked down Prince John's bedroom door down. The prince had not arrived for breakfast nor did he arrive to pray for his brother's death and no one could find him preening in a mirror nearby. Hoping for the worst they had knocked the door down in excitement...

Only to find the prince whimpering in the corner of his room, hair hacked and dyed a variety of wild colours, nails torn out, eyebrows plucked, legs hairless and a huge gash on his arm.

On the wall above written in dark red paint were the words: **RRA was here! **

"What does this mean father?" a guard asked the bishop.

"It is either the Anti-Christ or an angel....depends on how much you love Prince John" the bishop murmured.

"An angel then" the guards muttered.

RHRHRHRHRHRHRH

"Hey L.C?"

"Hmmm?"

"Do you think nicking a pint of Prince John's blood and using it to paint on the wall was too much?"

"No not really...why you're not regretting suggesting it are you Vicky?"

"Nah...just wondering if we should do the same for Guy"

"YOU'RE NOT HARMING MY SWEET GIZZY!"

"Ow no need to throw a pillow at me!"

"PILLOW FIGHT!"

"OW! JOSIE THAT'S NOT A PILLOW!!!!"

"Sorry!"


	10. The RRA Returns: To Knock Some Sense

**Author's Note: next chapter will be torturing Isabella, so I want everyone's ideas in (and be descriptive)!**

It was a quiet afternoon, the Outlaws were eating lunch while Allan went to get some more firewood and check on the traps in case of a rich noble got caught or a helpless squirrel (that way dinner would be available). Guy, Much and John were spending the whole meal glaring at one another while Tuck and Robin were drawing up plans to trick Isabella and Kate was thinking of her own plays to get rid off Guy.

It was then when the horrifying sound of the RRA TARDIS was heard. The moment the box materialised properly the doors opened and the large gang of girls ran out screaming on the top of the voices.

"YOU IDIOTS!!!!!"

"SUPER L.C PUNCH!"

"ULTIMATE ZAZZY PUNCH!"

"DEANNIE SLAP!"

A giant cat puppet on Deannie's hand popped up with its own very realistic claws, scratching the gang as well sending them flying.

"What the hell?!" Robin shouted rubbing his cheek.

Guy attempted to hide behind John only to be pushed back in the front.

"We're furious with you all!" Paula said hands on her hips. "Well...apart from Guy"

"WHAT?!"

"Why is Guy getting immunity, he killed my brother!" Kate snarled.

"Oh shut your mouth, I'm getting sick of hearing that every five minutes!" Mysty snapped.

"It's because Guy was actually the smart one out of you all" L.C explained. "You lot acted like idiots leaving Guy being the voice of reason"

Guy looked emotionless as he ignored the glares from the other Outlaws. "That sounds about right" he said calmly.

"So we're here to knock sense into you!" Mira declared.

Tvnut snatched Tuck up into a suffocating embrace. "I'm sorry honey but it's for your own good" she said sweetly before with the help of Foxy and Lolly turning him around and beginning to bash his head against a tree.

Deannie, Mira and Vicky took Much while Zara, Josie, Voldy, Mysty and L.C took Little John and Paula, Zebbie and Soapy took Robin.

Cee sat down next to Guy and carried on flirting with him while Guy was keeping an eye out for an escape route.

For a good half hour the Outlaws were having their heads bashed against the trees by the RRA while having a lot of abuse shouted at them for being idiots. Guy had no idea what the Outlaws actually done but somehow didn't think literally knocking sense into them would help in the future.

After all the whole lot of them were idiots.

"Hey you better not have eaten everything, I'm star-"

Allan dropped the firewood he had collected when he spotted his friends being beaten by the terrifying RRA gang. The RRA paused and looked at him.

"ALLAN!!!!!!!!"

To the Outlaws horrified amusement all of the girls had let them go in favour of squishing Allan to death as they wailed in a eardrum breaking way with huge baby crocodile tears.

**Ten Hours Later....**

"Err...not being funny but your tears are kind of drowning my friends"


	11. The RRA Returns: To Torture Isabella

It was a normal day for Isabella as she strolled down the cold stone corridor of her castle plotting how to destroy Robin, the Outlaws and her brother when the grinding sound of the RRA TARDIS could be heard. Isabella's spies had informed her that the insane girls she had met before the previous sheriff's death always appeared out of a purple box that made strange sounds.

That purple box was appearing before her like magic this very moment.

The door opened and a small girl leaped out and growled menacingly when she saw Isabella. The small girl then charged at Isabella and tackled her to the floor. "DIE BITCH DIE!" She roared. "ROBIN WILL NEVER BE YOURS!!!!!!"

Isabella was too shocked to say anything.

"Err...this is Maple our new member, she's very enthusiastic in our new mission" Lolly said introducing the girl not to Isabella but to the guards that were watching in horror.

"Excuse me Ma'am" a guard said politely. "What is this mission of yours?"

"To torture Isabella, if you stay out of our way we won't hurt you" Lolly appeared to be completely polite, considerate and well mannered but the evil glint in her eye as she spoke to the guards was enough to scare them away.

By the time the whole RRA got out of the TARDIS not only were all the guards half-way out of the castle but Maple had tied and gagged Isabella.

"Right then, we got a very busy day ahead of us Bella" Josie said in a mocking tone. "We got sooooooooooooo many fun things planned"

Isabella gulped.

RHRHRHRHRHRHRHRHRHRH

Isabella was now dragged into the torture area of the dungeons where malicious bastards had once used hot pokers on innocents (or Allan), threatened to pull people's tongues out and have actually hacked body parts off. L.C, Paula, Zebbie, Soapy, Josie, Vicky, Voldy and Mysty were lagging behind everyone panting and huffing as they carried several large, heavy boxes filled with their own torture ideas.

"Now then what shall we start with?" Deannie mused holding up tweezers and staring at them in interest.

"We could start with a regular horrific makeover" Voldy grinned holding up pruning sheers. "She looks like she could use a hair cut"

"Then we could dye it in a nasty hair colour like neon pink" Mysty added.

"Nah...too simple" Deannie dismissed.

"We could scoop her heart out with a spoon" Tvnut offered holding the spoon eagerly with an evil grin.

"Too quick, it'll be over before we can start" L.C sighed.

"Let's use this!" Soapy suggested patting a large torture device that was already in the dungeons.

"But I wanted to-"

"It's not fair why can't we-"

"You always get to-"

Isabella began to feel incredibly nauseas as the RRA began an argument with very graphic and detailed torture ideas. As Maple got more graphic in the blood and gore department Isabella's eyes fluttered as she fainted.

RHRHRHRHRHRHRHRH

_Drip, drop, drip, drop, drip, drop, drip, drop_

Isabella moaned against her gag as she felt a very annoying constant dripping of cold water hitting her on the forehead. She opened her eyes to see a grinning L.C dripping a small drop of water on her forehead.

"Chinese water torture" L.C announced. "Slow but humiliating if you can hold back your begging"

"Humiliating how?" Vicky asked.

"She'll wet herself" L.C said.

"But that's going to take forever!" Josie whined. "We could do a thousand torture methods before it's finished"

"Josie we've done a hundred and two on her before she even woke up" Zebbie pointed out.

"I dunno hacking her hair and dying it pink while drawing all over her face in permanent black marker isn't exactly what I call torture" Mira muttered.

"Still fun" Voldy said rubbing her hands together snickering.

"Besides it made her scream in her sleep when we pulled her legs hairs out one by one with Deannie's new tweezers" Mysty pointed out.

"I need new tweezers" Deannie grumbled. "No way am I using those ones again"

"It's boring sitting around; I want to punish her for what she did to my Guy!" Cee said crossing her arms.

"We could always read her this" Paula said holding up a notebook with the words scribbled on the front cover: **Boeist Bible; the words of Jack Harkness. DO NOT READ IF YOU WISH TO REMAIN SANE!**

"Paula are you trying to torture Isabella or us?" L.C asked shuddering at the memory of the last time they read it.

"I can never look at a pot plant the same way again" Voldy muttered.

"None of us can" Deannie said rubbing the Goosebumps on her arms.

_Drip, drop, drip, drop, drip, drop, drip, drop_

Unable to hold it in anymore, Isabella humiliated herself by wetting herself. The RRA wrinkled their nose in disgust when they realised knickers weren't invented in the 12th century.

RHRHRHRHRHRHRHRHRH

Robin and his gang couldn't help but laugh. Isabella was tied to her throne like chair in front of the whole Nottingham with her hair hacked to the point where you can see bald spots, dyed a hideous shade of pink and a black Hitler like moustache drawn under her nose. The word 'bitch' printed in bold capitals on her forehead and her clothes were worse than a normal peasant.

She was also being forced to watch as her rich clothing was being burned.

Her jewellery and gold were given to the poor by the RRA who were shouting merrily.

"GET THE HAGS JEWELS! EAT FOR A WHOLE DECADE BY SELLING THIS NECKLACE; WE'RE GIVING IT TO YOU FOR FREE!"

Isabella finally free of her gag mouthed "help me" to Robin.

Robin shook his head and mouthed "not a chance" while laughing hysterically as L.C, Vicky and Mysty began to act out a little sketch pretending to be Isabella, Prince John and Guy.

Guy was not amused.

Neither was Cee.

RHRHRHRHRHRHRHRHRHRH

It has been a whole week since the Outlaws saw the RRA torturing Isabella. As amusing they had found it the whole gang had voted to stay away from Nottingham in case of another beating or insane wedding.

After all they only just got Much back and they don't want to see him being carted off by Deannie again.

They were walking along the dusty road when they saw the asylum cart driving past, to their amusement and surprise inside the cart was a hysterically giggling Isabella in her rags, pink hacked hair, drawn on moustache and wild eyes scanning her surrounding area.

"My god they turned her completely and utterly insane" Tuck whispered making a cross sign with his fingers as the cart drove past.

"OI! My sister is a bitch not the spawn of Satan" Guy growled glaring at the monk.

"Hey you hated her as well" Kate muttered.

"Yeah but your hate came from jealousy" Little John pointed out.

"Not being funny" Allan said watching the cart. "But wasn't Isabella a little insane to begin with?"


	12. The RRA Returns: To Punish Archer

Archer was taking a stroll through the forest mentally snickering at the memory of his two older brothers arguing...again. For some reason whenever Guy and Robin argue it always ends up in hilarious wrestling fights. Archer's thoughts were forgotten when he heard a strange grinding sound and the purple box of doom he had heard so much about appeared before his very eyes.

The door opened and a young girl ran out on all fours and attacked his leg. Her teeth digging into his shin and her nails clinging onto his knee tightly.

"What the fuck?!" he shouted wobbling around on one leg as she tried to shake off the girl. "Get off of me you bitch!"

"Err...Maple I don't know if you realised this but...you can't actually turn into a wolf" Paula said nervously as she scratched the back of her head.

"I know" Maple's voice came out muffled against Archer's leg; she let go and turned round to face her sisters. "But I so wanted to bite his leg off"

"I always wanted to turn into a wolf" Josie said dreamily.

"No you just wanted Jacob Black" L.C said teasingly as she poked Josie's side.

"Who wouldn't want Jacob Black?" Josie asked. "He's ten times better than Edward Cullen"

"That's not true!" L.C, Vicky, Tvnut and some of the other Team Edward members shouted.

"JACOB BLACK IS MINE!" Mira shouted. "SO NO ONE TOUCH HIM!"

The girls ended up bickering about who was better, Edward Cullen or Jacob Black. While Archer found it all amusing he's gut instinct which got him out of loads of messy tight spots told him to run now.

So he did.

"OI HE'S GETTING AWAY!" Deannie shouted.

"AFTER HIM!" Cee yelled leading the hunt.

RHRHRHRHRHRHRHRHRH

Archer was nearing Nottingham when he was suddenly tackled by a beautiful blonde woman. He grinned up at her and used his best flirtatious voice. "Hello gorgeous"

The blonde punched him.

He can feel blood trickling down from his nose.

"What was that for?!"

"My heart belongs only to Guy of Gisbourne, you cannot have it" the blonde said hotly.

Behind the blonde was the large group of other girls lagging behind as they panted. Most of them looked ragged, dirty and for some reason had dead leaves tangled up in their hair.

"What took you so long?" the blonde demanded.

The brunette with the most leaves tangled in her hair and had glasses falling off her face collapsed on her back. "I...hate...running" she wheezed.

"We all sort of...tripped over the same root and landed on each other" Zebbie explained sitting down.

Josie pulled out a bottle of water she had in her bag and poured its contents on the almost unconscious brunette. "STEPHIE WAKE UP!"

The brunette merely glared and crossed her arms.

"Oh c'mon L.C we're here to punish Archer for his crimes" Soapy said nudging L.C with her toe.

"What crimes?!" Archer shouted.

"Well lets see first whatever you did to get yourself arrested causing the whole crap to start with" Deannie said.

"Then the fact you were sleeping with the Sheriff of York's wife" Voldy added.

"Then you betrayed Guy and Robin" Cee said accidentally on purposely kneeing Archer in the balls causing him to groan pathetically.

"Then you side with Isabella" Lolly said narrowing her eyes.

"However since you ended up saving Robin, Guy and Much" Tvnut said brightly.

"We decided to give you a reward" L.C finished still gasping for breath.

"What kind of reward?" Archer asked suspiciously.

Suddenly Cee was pushed off of him and Voldy was now sitting on him. "You're going to marry me!" she squealed.

"NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!"

RHRHRHRHRHRHRHRHRH

Djaq and Will were just finishing cleaning out the pigeon hutches when they heard a distant scream.

"Did you hear something?" Will asked.

"A vague scream of horror" Djaq mumbled. "But it's the tenth one I heard this month alone"

"I bet it has something to do with that RRA" Will muttered under his breath.

**To be continued....**


	13. The RRA Returns: To Marry Archer

Archer sighed in relief when he saw Robin, Guy and the Outlaws head his way. He knew they would help him out with these insane girls; he smirked as he pictured the group running away laughing and succeeding escaping the RRA.

"Oh thank god, these girls want me to marry one of them" he said. "Tell them I can't because of my wonderful fiancé, right?"

"Sorry mate but none of us are suicidal" Allan said. "You're going to marry whichever one they want to"

"It's not overly bad" Much said flushing pink. "I'm married to Deannie"

"But I don't wanna be tied down" Archer whined.

"Not being funny mate but you sorta already are" Allan pointed out.

"What?!"

It was then Archer realised during his begging for help the RRA had tied him up and were now picking him up.

"Here comes the groom, all tied up, dum, dum, dum" Zara sang under her breath.

"NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!"

"We'll see you at the ceremony" Robin shouted waving goodbye to his younger brother, he then dried a fake tear off. "Our baby brother growing up already"

"I wish you'd grow up" Guy muttered darkly under his breath.

RHRHRHRHRHRHRHRH

Guy felt rather uncomfortable, not because he was sitting next to Robin while watching his brother being dragged down the aisle by L.C but because he had Cee sitting right up close next to him with a smile that could only be described as evil.

"Maybe we should get married next?" Cee purred.

"No" Guy said coldly.

"Doesn't matter what you say, it'll happen anyway whether or not you're willing" Cee said confidently.

"Is it just me or did that sound like rape?" Allan whispered in Guy's ear.

"Not just you" Guy mumbled back.

"Dearly beloved, we're gathered here today the celebrate the enslavement-"

"ENSLAVEMENT?!" Archer yelped interrupting L.C who was glaring at him.

"Does anyone beside the groom having any objections?" no one dared hold their hand up. "Good, well then do you Archer take Voldy to be your beloved wife? To love and honour? To cherish and obey? Till death do you part?"

"Is it me or has she changed it from the last time?" Tuck asked.

"L.C likes to change things, keep it fresh y'know" Lolly explained watching the wedding in rapt interest.

"Like I have any choice" Archer grumbled. "I do"

Voldy beamed as L.C continued. "And do you Voldy take this gorgeous prat to be your beloved husband? To love and disobey? To cherish and order around? To kick butt for all eternity?"

"I do!" Voldy squealed.

"Then I now pronounce you prat and wife, you may kiss the bride" L.C closing the book she was reading throughout the ceremony.

Voldy tackled Archer onto the floor and everyone decided to leave them there and have some food instead.

Though Mysty was toying with the idea of kicking Archer, after all Voldy is her biological sister and she should protect her no matter what.

RHRHRHRHRHRHRHRHRHRH

Kate was on her way to hide in a tree far away when someone grabbed hold of her wrist. To her horror it was Deannie who was looking pleadingly up at her.

"Kate, I'm going to say this once and only once but..." Deannie fidgeted looking uncomfortable. "But I wanted to say sorry!"

Kate looked at the strawberry blonde, gobsmacked.

"I mean...part of it was out of annoyance because lets face it at the beginning of the series you were rather annoying" Deannie rambled. "Then part of it was out of jealousy because Much fancied you and you kept abusing that for the sake of Robin....but overall...well I think you're a cool character now"

Kate blinked.

"So now you no longer have to run each time you hear the TARDIS because no one will hurt you anymore" Deannie promised.

Kate then fainted out of sheer shock.

RHRHRHRHRHRHRHRHRH

Robin was struggling under the extra weight; he could feel sweat forming on his forehead and his arms loosing its grip on the girl that had her legs wrapped round his waist.

"Erm...little girl could you please let go of me?" he asked sweetly.

"I'M NOT A LITTLE GIRL! I'M THIRTEEN!" she screeched in his ear causing him to wince. She then buried her head into his shoulder. "I love you Robin Hood" she mumbled.

"Help!" he mouthed to the Outlaws.

Allan was dancing with Mira, Little John was busy with majority of the RRA who were all dancing, Guy was trying to hide from Cee, Much was feeding Deannie, god knows where Kate went and Tuck was being cornered by Tvnut...

He had to rely on his own wits for this...

"Erm, Maple if you get off of me I'll give you a kiss on the cheek" he said.

"OK!" the girl suddenly leaped off of him and held her cheek out for him to kiss. Robin applied and she squealed. "I shall never wash this cheek again!" she shouted.

"Don't worry I'll make sure she does whether I have to tie her down to a chair" L.C muttered to Josie who looked disgusted.

Meanwhile Tvnut was giving Tuck a heartbroken look as he tried to gently let her down.

"...it's just I made my vows to God and I can't break holy vows" he finished looking terrified.

"So you're saying" Tvnut said slowly. "That if you met me before God _then _we might have had a relationship"

"Erm...yes?"

"Ooh you kinky monk" Tvnut teased lightly punching his arm, she then whirled round to face her sisters. "We need to go back in time so Tuck meets me before God" she announced loudly.

"How is she going to accomplish that?" Allan muttered. "Go back to the time when he was foetus?"

Tuck had a very horrible feeling that he had only encouraged Tvnut even more...

RHRHRHRHRHRHRHRH

The RRA were about to say their goodbyes (Voldy had Archer nicely tied up to take back home) when suddenly a loud beeping noise came from Mira's pocket. She took a small device out and read something on the screen. She growled and chucked her phone away.

"I don't freaking care if Michael Jackson died!!!!!! Stop sending me freaking text messages about it!" she shouted before marching into the TARDIS.

The others followed with mumbled agreements and muttered comments.

"Who is Michael Jackson and what did he die of?" Much wondered.

"Who knows, but lets prayer for his soul" Tuck said clasping his hands together.

The Outlaws all bowed their heads down and held a minute of silence while praying to God on the behalf of Michael Jackson.


	14. The RRA Returns: To Destroy the Army

Robin and Guy were about to cross the gate when the familiar grinding sound of the RRA TARDIS could be heard. The purple box appeared and the door opened. To the men's shock and horror the whole RRA spilled out dressed in armour and carrying scary and painful looking weapons.

"ATTACK!" Mira screamed.

"DIE VAISY DIE!!!!!" Paula shrieked.

"GRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRR" L.C's chainsaw growled.

Guy and Robin backed their horses into the courtyard and signalled Much and Tuck to close the gates.

"What happened?" Kate asked.

"Err...you might want to see this, then again if you eaten you might not" Little John said watching everything from his post while pulling sympathetic and disgusted faces. "Those poor men, not all of them deserved that"

"What's happening to the Sheriff?" Robin asked.

Little John choked slightly. "Sorry rather not give a description, I think I'm about to throw up"

Everyone paled as they tried to picture what they were doing.

"I bet they're Torturing him, destroying him, pulling him to pieces, burning him at the stake, hanging him and then dropping him in boiling water" Much said looking pleased.

"Dear god you're sadistic as them" Archer muttered.

"It's what I wanted to do, the bastard killed Allan!" Much shouted.

"Hmm...Do you think they'll do that to Isabella if we asked them?" Guy wondered.

"Give them a moment" John said. "They're only on pulling him to pieces right now"

....

"I WASN'T BEING SERIOUS!" Much squeaked.


	15. The RRA Returns: RRA Vs BBC

The BBC writers were sitting there discussing a new show where they'll make amazing characters, interesting events and beautiful pairings...before totally destroying it by murder when the doors were suddenly thrown open. There stood three girls, an olive tone skinned one with glasses and dark hair in the middle with a strawberry blonde on one side and a blonde on her other.

"We are the RRA, I am the leader Mira and we're here to destroy you" Mira said, hands on her hips.

"How dare you kill Guy?" Cee shouted. "He was the love of my life"

A BBC writer pressed the emergency red button under his desk.

"Nothing will happen, we already disabled the security before we even entered the building" Deannie smirked. "Now then, we are an army of almost 20; we've already destroyed the pathetic army the Sheriff created. We fought in WW1 and 2-"

"L.C's fault" Mira and Cee grumbled under their breath.

"Fought in the Hundred Year War, five times-"

"L.C's fault again"

"Fought in the Holy Lands-"

"Zara's fault"

"And finally fought with insane fan girls over hot characters-"

"Fan girls fault"

"So we're going to take over and you'll do everything we say" Deannie finished off smirking. "Do you have a problem with that?"

"Err..."a writer said nervously, shaking all over as he sweated a river. "Excuse me...there's only three of you"

Mira, Cee and Deannie blinked. They turned round to see no sign of L.C, Zebbie, Paula, Josie, Soapy, Lolly, Tvnut, Foxy, Maple, Mysty, Zara, Vicky and Voldy at all.

"Oh well" Mira shrugged. "Three is enough to make Hitler wet the bed; it'll be enough to destroy the BBC"

"Yeah but where is everyone?!"

RHRHRHRHRHRHRHRH

He was running through the building, almost out of breath while thankful his job had required him to run a lot, in fully costume. It was probably the costume being the reason why no one was helping him. They probably thought it was a filming day.

"SOMEONE, HELP, PLEASE!" he shouted desperately.

"Bloody Doctor Who" he heard an Eastenders producer growl. "Always getting the bigger budget to have hidden cameras"

"THIS ISN'T A FILMING DAY, SECURITY HELP!" he shouted again.

No one came to his rescue.

Not even Catherine who just fell out of her chair in hysterical laughter when they first arrived.

Well that shouldn't really surprise him but still....

"GOT YOU!"

He was suddenly tackled to the ground by a group of girls at varied ages.

"You're all mine now!" one of them said smugly.

"Help...." he croaked to one of the Robin Hood extras who were walking past.

The extra merely ran.

RHRHRHRHRHRHRHRH

"Breaking new as the BBC has been taken over by a mysterious and suspected terrorist group by the name of the RRA" the newswoman said. "While the government are trying to find information on the mysterious group, the RRA released a message"

The image of the newswoman vanished and was replaced by three girls.

"I, Mira, leader of the RRA solemnly swear to re-write and re-film series 3 of Robin Hood" the middle girl said. "We are going to include Marian, Djaq and Will. Save Guy, Robin and Allan and continue to write many more series"

The image switched back to the newswoman. "In further news, David Tenant is missing. There's no leads on where he-"

A pale skinned, dark haired girl switched her TV off and picked up her phone. She dialled a number and waited impatiently for someone to answer. "Hi! Mrs Clark, can I speak to Stephanie please?" silence, the girl tapped a beat on her desk. "Stephanie? Nothing much, just wanted to say....I KNOW YOU HAVE DAVID TENANT!"

A moment silence.

"DON'T LIE I CAN HEAR HIM SCREAMING FOR HELP AGAINST THE GAG!"


	16. The RRA Returns: To Steal Marian's Dress

His heart beat sped rapidly as a grin grew on his face. Marian, she looked radiant in her beautiful blue gown as she stepped closer, her hand reaching out to him...

Suddenly she was being tackled to the ground by L.C.

"WHAT THE FUCK?" he shouted.

"So sorry for spoiling the moment but this dress is sooooooooooooooooooo beautiful!" L.C cooed. "So I'm stealing it!"

"What?" Marian shrieked as she struggled against L.C. "Who the hell are you?"

"I'm L.C from the RRA, a society that was created to avenge your death" L.C explained cheerfully as she searched for the zipper on Marian's dress.

"So you're here to steal my dress? Are you nuts?"

"I never said we were sane" L.C said in a serious tone. "Besides, it was either steal your dress or go to wherever you went to buy one and no offense but I don't want to die just yet"

"Well can you hurry up and go!" Robin snapped. "I want to spend forever with my wife in peace away from you"

"Ah...yes, your forever is going to have to wait a little longer. Josie is injecting the antidote just as we speak"

"What?"

"Don't worry, you still have Kate, not that we approve much but she's still a nice person"

"Kate? Who the hell is she?" Marian demanded looking furious.

"Ooh, someone's in trouble" L.C giggled. "Best not tell her about Isabella"

"There's an Isabella too? Right that's it, when you do die properly you'll never have sex" Marian shouted.

"NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!"

RHRHRHRHRHRHRH

Robin then woke up. He looked around to see Kate snuggling into her pillow, Little John snoring away, Much wheezing, and Tuck muttering prayers, Guy holding a dagger (he was paranoid even in his sleep the poor bugger) and Allan watching him with raised eyebrows.

"I had a horrible nightmare about those RRA girls" he confessed.

"Don't worry mate, we all have them" Allan said sympathetically. "Just last night I had one of them drowning me in honey"

"Why honey?" Robin asked, wondering if he should question Allan's sanity as well as the RRA.

"Not sure but I think it had something to do with the fact I ate lots of honey before bed"


	17. The RRA Returns: To Save the World

**Author's Note: this chapter is a crossover with Torchwood. It had to be done.**

They sat there in silence, enjoying the afternoon while feasting on the food they had stolen from the Sheriff's stocks. It was a beautiful afternoon, warm, sunny and yet there was a pleasant breeze to keep them from overheating. Despite the perfect afternoon the whole gang sat there with a frown on their faces.

"It's quiet too quiet" Little John muttered to himself.

"Do you think something happened to them? Like a bear ate them or someone hurt them?" Much asked worriedly.

"Somehow I don't think that's possible" Kate said reassuringly and truthfully, she couldn't see a bear getting away with eating the RRA or anyone getting away with hurting just one of them...

"SO WHERE THE HELL ARE THEY?!"

"I even miss that annoying twerp that kept telling me off for being near Mira" Allan muttered.

RHRHRHRHRHRHRHRH

Meanwhile in present time England, the government were discussing which children to give to the aliens to save the world when suddenly the windows crashed and several teenage girls flew in on ropes. Everyone jumped out of their seats.

"But...how....who are you?"

"Your worst nightmare if you don't let us sort this mess out" one of the girls growled. "We are the RRA, my name is Mira and we're here to solve everything without resorting to any human's death"

"But you're just children!" a woman exclaimed.

"I'M NOT A CHILD I'M THIRTEEN!" Maple shrieked causing the government officials to step away slowly.

Josie patted Maple's back. "There, there, pain in the arse I know but you got to calm down"

"Look, I don't know who you think you are but these aliens are dangerous and-"

"L.C if you can please explain to this people who exactly we are" Mira interrupted coldly.

L.C stood in front of the government officials and held up a photo of the Sheriff and Isabella. "This is what they looked before they met us" she held up another one and everyone gave horrified gasps, someone even vomited. "This is after they met us" she held up a picture of an army. "Before" another picture that caused more screaming and vomiting. "After. Do any of you have any problems?"

"N-no" The Prime Minister said weakly.

TWTWTWTWTWTWTW

Jack and Ianto were about to go in, confront the alien and save the world when they suddenly got a call from Gwen saying some psycho girls who definitely have her vote to be the Prime Minister are going to sort it out instead. They stood there outside of the strange metal cube thing that the alien was residing in when a group of teenage girls came in.

"JACK AND IANTO!" they all squealed.

Much to Jack's and Ianto's shock they were crushed by a huge group hug, plenty of the girls crying over their 'sweet, innocent, wicked, poor Ianto' and swearing to stop the 546 no matter what.

"But it's dangerous" Jack argued.

"I eat danger for breakfast" Deannie said sassily.

"She's not joking, she eats Danger Mouse cereal each morning" Cee said grinning.

The girls put their orange helmets on and went into the cube.

Silence.

More silence.

And then...

And then...

Screaming, the most anguished, terrified screaming.

"Oh god" Ianto choked out.

"Those poor but very stupid girls" Jack muttered he saluted the cube. "God bless them for their bravery"

The door opened and one of the girls popped her head out. "Any of you fancy a 546 Kebab? We're having a BBQ right now, don't worry L.C isn't cooking"

"I HEARD THAT!"

"Err...no thank you" Jack said weakly turning green.

"I think...I'm going to be sick" Ianto muttered.

TWTWTWTWTWTWTW

"The children are no longer speaking in unison, it has been theorised that the children had plotted all of this on the internet and that there was no threat from beyond our planet" the news reader said. "In further news the world's government has been taken over by a group of teenage girls, our new leaders go by the name of RRA and already reduced crime and war. People are expecting great things from these girls"


	18. The RRA Returns: To Be Worshipped

**Author's Note: a crossover with House of Night, as requested by Mira**

It was a dark night, the stars were twinkling and the moon shone bright silver as students with their dark blue outlined tattoos walked across the campus. Zoey, Erin, Shaunee, Jack and Damien were enjoying the cool night by lounging under a tree. It was then when the peace was broken by a loud grinding sound, soon a purple box materialised and the doors opened as a group of girls spilled out.

"OH MY GOD!" they group squealed and before they knew it the gang was squashed into a large group hug.

"Who the hell are you?" Shaunee said struggling out of someone's grasp.

"Yeah, what sort of freak just appears out of no where and starts hugging a stranger?" Erin said in agreement of her 'twin'.

The strange girls pulled away, all of them had their hands on their hips.

"Oh no, they didn't!"

"They did"

"They called us freaks"

"Asked who the hell we are"

"I thought we were famous now, tragic isn't sis?"

"Very tragic sis"

Zoey, Jack and Damien stared at the strange girls in horror. "My god..." Damien breathed. "They're worse than the twins"

"Scary" Jack whispered.

"Nyx protect us" Zoey whispered to the sky.

"Now excuse me" Mira said politely. "Could you tell me where Erik Night is?"

"Erm...well he should be in his office right now" Damien said blinking in confusion, how did Erik know this strange girls?

"Thank you" Mira and Josie left, heading towards Erik Night's office, the remaining girls snickered.

"He's doomed" Paula predicted.

"More than doomed his damned" Zebbie sniggered.

"He was already damned, now he's worse than damned" Lolly pointed out.

"Hey, where did Maple and Zara go?" L.C asked scanning the surrounding area for two of the youngest of their group.

"Don't worry Mother I'm sure they're safe" Cee said teasingly.

RHRHRHRHRHRHRHRHRH

"HELP! HELP SOMEONE PLEASE!"

A random student was running as fast as he could from two very insane humans who were chasing him with crayons and glitter. However he wasn't fast enough as the darker skinned one tackled him to the ground, and the paler girl straddled his waist.

"Now...Zazzy what colour should I do? Green or yellow?"

"Hmm...GREEN!" Zara shouted gleefully. "Try to get some on the outline and see if it'll turn yellow"

"Great idea Zazzy" Maple said leaning in closer and closer to the vampire with a green crayon ready to colour in his crescent moon tattoo.

RHRHRHRHRHRHRHRH

Aphrodite came across the other RRA girls and the gang giggling at some story, the beautiful blonde had the most evil smirk on her face that the RRA identified with....something evilly wonderful had happened to someone.

"What are you smirking for?" Erin asked glaring.

"Yeah whore, you look like the cat got the cream..." Shaunee said in agreement.

"She must have gotten-"

"Some cream"

"Ew, just Ew" Zoey mumbled though she knew there was a small chance the twins were right.

"Actually I was walking past Erik's office and found the bastard hanging upside down by his toes and two random girls were torturing him" Aphrodite said looking very pleased.

Zoey, Erin, Shaunee, Jack and Damien looked at the RRA in horror as the group let out maniac whoops of hysterical laughter.

Goddess protect them was the thought they shared.

Zebbie stopped laughing as she looked round to see another member missing. "Guys, Deannie's gone missing as well"

"WHAT?!" the others screeched causing the vampires to wince.

"We got to look for her, I mean a vampire could have bitten her" Paula said fearfully.

"Nah, they're not that stupid" Cee said calmly.

The group got up and began to wander along; the temple was noticeably full and lit up as they could hear people chanting.

"What do you think is happening there, can't be a circle or anything" Zoey said frowning.

"Lets check it out" Vicky said running ahead with the RRA following.

Inside much to everyone's shock was Deannie lounging on throne, wearing a beautiful white dress and surrounded by cats, many were resting on her lap, on the arms of her chair, her shoulder and rubbing their faces against her legs.

"What on earth happened to you?" Voldy asked.

"I was searching for a loo and these cats wouldn't stop following me, gorgeous aren't they?" Deannie said snuggling into one of the purring cats. "They all think I'm Nyx reincarnated so I'm being prayed to and worshiped"

"I don't get it" Paula murmured.

"The vampires think she's their goddess what's to get?" Mysty asked raising an eyebrow.

RHRHRHRHRHRHRHRH

It had now been three months since the RRA had visited them, the gang now worried that Much was right and the girls had gotten lost in the forest were now searching for them. Much was prying open the jaws of a large cave bear and peering inside.

"Deannie? Sweetie-pie, are you in there?" he called into the smelly breathed, furious bear.

Little John face palmed at his friend's stupidity.


	19. The RRA Returns: To Go to Hogwarts Prt 1

**Author's Note: this is Mira's B-day pressie!**

Harry, Ron and Hermione were walking down the large grassy hill when they heard a strange grinding sound. Much to their shock a purple box materialised in front of them.

"Bloody hell what spell is this?" Ron asked awed.

"I don't know, I don't think I have ever read about anything like this before" Hermione said.

Suddenly the doors opened and a large group of girls ran out cackling on the top of their voices as they ran towards Hogwarts.

"What was that?" Harry asked.

"A bunch of nutters?" Ron suggested. "Come on lets find Hagrid"

They trio walked off ignoring the shouts that were coming from the school.

RHRHRHRHRHRHRHRHRH

"I must say" Albus Dumbledore said his blue eyes twinkling in amusement. "You're all very engaging women. Very passionate to start up a club because someone you loved was murdered and to become very loving friends...well I am impressed. Lemon sherbet?"

"Oh yes please"

"Ta very much"

"I was wondering when you'd offer"

The group of girls all accepted a lemon sherbet and beamed up at one of the most understanding people in the world. After all he was just insane as them if not less.

"However I do think your activities are a little...extreme. We all like a bit of fun but helping Peeves dump some of the Slytherins including Professor Snape head first in the toilets isn't right" Dumbledore said slightly scolding while his lips twitched in amusement. "So I think we should have you sorted so I can deduct points, I never liked the detention system"

The girls grinned and huddled round the sorting hat excitedly.

"I'm not going to sing another song" the hat groused. "I haven't finished next years yet"

"Doesn't matter my dear hat just please sort these charming ladies for us" Dumbledore said twinkling.

"How does he do that?" Maple whispered.

Josie shrugged. "Constant spotlight so the light will always hit his eyes?" she suggested.

"Huh?"

"Never mind"

"Shall we begin with Miss Maple?" Dumbledore said holding the hat up, Maple shrugged and stepped up to the old man and allowed him to put the hat on her.

"GRYFFINDOR!"

"Zebbie?"

"RAVENCLAW!"

"Paula?"

"GRYFFINDOR!"

"Josie?"

"GRYFFINDOR!"

"Lolly?"

"RAVENCLAW!"

"Cee?"

"SLYTHERIN!"

"Mira?"

"SLYTHERIN!"

"Deannie?"

"SLYTHERIN!"

"Vicky?"

"GRYFFINDOR!"

"Voldy...interesting name, though I don't think Tom will appreciate the humour"

"GRYFFINDOR!"

"Mysty?"

"RAVENCLAW!"

"Zara?"

"GRYFFINDOR!"

"Foxy?"

"HUFFLEPUFF!"

"Tvnut?"

"GRYFFINDOR!"

"Lady Clark? Please Miss Clark don't use the Weasley here I don't think Molly is quite ready to see her sons married yet"

L.C shrugged and allowed the hat to be placed on her head. Everyone sat there in silence watching, thirty minutes went by and the Hat still hadn't spoken.

"Oh hurry up L.C!" Josie whined.

"This woman is being difficult!" the Hat shouted. "She keeps changing course in her thoughts, first they're sweet loyal Hufflepuff, then intelligent Ravenclaw, then reckless Gryffindor and then cunning Slytherin! They keep changing! I pity the bloke that marries her!"

"Didn't he make the same complaint about us?" Zebbie murmured to Mysty.

"Yeah...well lets hope this Hat hasn't got any secret anatomy otherwise he won't have it anymore" Mysty muttered back.

"For god sake L.C just think of the twins!" Mira shouted.

"GRYFFINDOR!"

Everyone sighed in relief that it was over.

"Well then, I say 15 points off of Slytherin, 5 points off Hufflepuff, 40 points off Gryffindor and 15 points off Ravenclaw" Dumbledore said clapping his hands. "Now dinner is about to start in an hours time, would you like to meet your fellow housemates first?"

Before Dumbledore could finish the sentence the girls ran out of his office screaming happily.

Dumbledore chuckled. "Really delightful girls"

"Yeah if you're deaf" one of the portraits muttered.

RHRHRHRHRHRHRHRH

Zebbie, Lolly and Mysty gathered round Luna Lovegood on the Ravenclaw table in the Great Hall. Luna fitted in amazingly well with them, even if she didn't have any bloodthirsty thoughts. From the corner of her eye Zebbie could see Foxy content with Cedric Diggory who was looking a bit nervous (Mysty also looked a bit jealous so the poor bloke should hide soon), Mira, Cee and Deannie flicking peas at certain Slytheirn's heads, the Gryffindor girls (minus L.C) getting along well with Hermione, Ginny, Ron and Harry.

"....so yes I do believe the purple monkeys will take over the world" Luna finished her speech off as she cut her broccoli into triangles. "They already offered to make me their advisor apparently they already have a queen"

"Right" Lolly said amused.

Suddenly fireworks exploded in midair and Fred and George flew in on the broomsticks flinging freebies from their shop. A packet of nosebleed nougat landed on Zebbie's lap. To her amusement L.C was sitting on the back of one of the twins' broom, clinging onto him tightly.

"She works fast" Mysty laughed clapping for the twins.

"Oh look" Luna said dreamily. "It's the queen of the purple monkeys"

**TBC...**


	20. The RRA Returns: To Go to Hogwarts Prt 2

The next day Zebbie, Tvnut, Mysty, Lolly, Paula, Vicky, Foxy, Voldy, Zara and Josie were sitting with Luna Lovegood. Luna Lovegood had agreed with their views on many things for example chocolate can prevent cancer. Which lead to talking about certain chocolate bar companies testing on animals where Josie and Luna ended up starting a protest campaign in Hogwarts together. Sadly only Hermione joined in.

Most wizards had no idea what Mars ® was and the ones that did refused.

"Hang on where's L.C, Mira, Deannie and Cee?" Lolly asked noticing that four of the members had not shown up at all even though they agreed to meet up this morning so they could plot insane revenge against Umbridge.

"I believe L.C is with the twins doing god knows what" Tvnut said wiggling her eyebrows to suggest L.C was up to lots of mischief. "And I heard from some Slytherins that Mira, Deannie and Cee are in detention"

"What for?" Foxy asked dodging another every flavoured bean that Mysty has been flicking at her. "And will you stop that?"

"Not until you leave Cedric alone" Mysty said. "And be grateful I'm not doing worse"

"Trust me I am" Foxy mumbled.

"Well from what I heard the three of them washed Snape's hair...forcefully" Paula said giggling at the memory when they did Guy's hair not so long ago. "Tie dyed his robes in bright colour, used one of Voldy's gender changing potions on all of the sixth year Slytherins....apparently Malfoy makes a lovely girl"

"They also convinced the house elves to put puking pastilles in all of the Slytherins breakfast, blocked the boy's toilets causing a flood in the dormitories, transfigured Pansy Parkinson into an actual dog, put Millicent Bulestrode in a cage, change the password to the common room to Harry Potter is the Best and blew up the dungeons" Vicky said counting the events on her fingers.

"So they have a lifetime detention with Snape and Filch then?" Zara asked waving her wand to create glitter snow which Luna was watching transfixed.

"Well....they're supposed to but knowing our beloved sisters they've done something and that's why they're running towards us now" Zebbie said pointing to the three girls in Slytherin uniform running towards them.

"Dumbles excused us from detention however we had to unchain Filch from the ceiling" Deannie said cheerfully.

"We've also been excused from classes so we can visit the Ministry" Mira said grinning.

"Excellent" Maple said with an evil glint in her eyes.

Luna smiled. "You must be sisters, you have the same plotting glint in your eyes" she said dreamily. "May I suggest the blood quill; I heard it puts inner demons inside you which must be why Harry was so angry last year"

"Can we keep her?" Foxy asked.

RHRHRHRHRHRHRHRH

The RRA girls looked horrified and sickened as they stepped into Umbridge's very pink and very frilly office.

"Urgh I think I'm going to be sick" Cee muttered clutching her stomach.

"You're not the only one" Vicky said turning a faint green.

"Hem, hem" came a sickly sweet voice. "I have no idea who you are but you must always knock before entering a respectable ladies room"

"Yeah but you're no lady" Tvnut said. "Nor do you deserve any respect"

"Why I never!" Umbridge raged, her fat face turning red. "I shall cut your tongue out and make you clean every floor of this building till you apologise"

"Get her" Mira said flatly.

Suddenly Umbridge was pinned to the ground as her frilly pinks clothes got ripped and her hair tugged out. L.C then walked in rolling a barrel.

"How did you get here?" Josie asked sitting up shocked.

"Fred and George dropped me off after showing me their shop" L.C said with a shrug.

"Ok what's with the barrel?" Deannie asked.

"Well I found this book I've been looking for, for months on end turned out to be in my desk drawer" L.C said pulling out a large green book.

"Horrible History, Cruel Crime and Painful Punishment by Terry Derry" Voldy read. "So?"

"Well...." L.C smirked. "Put Umbridge in this barrel please" after a lot of heaving and panting they managed to stuff the fat toad into the barrel. "Close the lid and then hammer this in" L.C pulled out two sharp nails.

The evil glint grew in the RRA girls' eyes as they proceeded to do so, ignoring Umbridge's shrill screams.

"Now I need a very steep hill to roll her off" L.C said.

"I know one" Paula said grinning evilly.

RHRHRHRHRHRHRHRHRHRH

Voldemort stormed through his top secret lair, furious, no one had answered his calls when he wanted a bubble bath and he wanted to know why. He stomped into the Death Eater lounge and was shocked to see all of his Death Eaters, tied up, gagged and covered in boils. A letter was stuck to Bellatrix's forehead; he peeled it off and read it.

**Dear Voldie **

**You suck! To be a better villain you need to have hair, de-age back to sixteen because you looked hot then and get better followers than these losers (apart from Bellatrix, she's actually very cool despite killing Sirius Black). When you do get better followers you must treat them with respect and kindness otherwise they'll only betray you or leg it when you fall out of power again.**

**Lots of love **

**Voldy, the better one than you :P**

**P.S: I will be more successful taking over the world than you **

Voldemort enraged tore the letter up and pulled out his wand to crucio the nearest Death Eater just as he was about to utter the incantation, his wand suddenly turned into a rubber chicken.

RHRHRHRHRHRHRHRHRH

Ron stared gobsmacked as a group of girls were hugging and crying Luna Lovegood as they were saying goodbye. "Blimey, who knew Loony Lovegood was so popular?"

A book hit him right in the eye, the corner jabbing the eyeball causing him to fall on the ground shrieking like a girl.

"That wasn't very nice my queen" Luna said mildly to L.C. "But thank you for defending me anyway. Farewell my sister, I am sure we will meet again when the purple monkeys succeed in taking over and Voldemort is long dead"

"Are you sure we can't keep her? I'll clean up after her, feed her and take her out for walks" Foxy pleaded.

Luna smiled serenely. "Alas Foxy I cannot go for Harry may need me at the final battle. Perhaps in two years time?" she turned to Deannie. "Also I believe someone is looking desperately for you"

Everyone stared at Luna curiously as she wandered off.

"I wonder what she meant by that"

RHRHRHRHRHRHRHRHRHRHRH

"Darling it's you! Oh I missed you! I missed you so much my darling" Much shouted excited as he ran up and started to snog the person he was talking to. "Deannie I love you"

"Err....not being funny mate but that's a tree"


	21. The RRA Returns: To Visit Night World

**Author's Note: for Cee who had requested the Night World (yes it's a crossover with Night World now). Happy Birthday Cee!**

In the Circle Daybreak headquarters, the calm before the storm was interrupted by something worse than the end of the world. A grinding engine like sound could be heard before a purple box appeared the vampires, witches, shape shifters and humans all stood staring at it in awe and shock. They'd never seen anything like it before...

The door opened and a large group of girls fell out.

"That's impossible, right?" Maggie said turning to her soul mate Delos. "Not that many people can fit in such a small box"

"I have learnt that anything is possible" Gillian answered before Delos could open his mouth; she received a glare from him that she ignored. Her large violet eyes were fixed on the strange group of girls. "Are you all sisters?" she asked.

"Sort of" one them answered shrugging.

She was immediately pushed away by an over-excited girl. "Right, we're going to be honest here, brutally honest. We want your soul mates, we've read the books and they're HOT! I really want Ash Redfern"

"Voldy! That hurts" the girl on the floor complained.

"Ah sorry Mysty" Voldy said sheepishly helping her older sister up.

Ash was edging towards the door. "I think I'll go and live in Mary-Lynette's closet for a while" he murmured to James on his way out.

"Oh no you don't" Deannie shouted shooting Ash with a stun gun. "Today is my Chelle's birthday and we're going to have the best time with you lot, so don't ruin it by running away, YOU COWARD!" she shot him again for good measure.

"Hang on, you can't just coming storming in here and announce you're taking our soul mates for the day" Jez snarled almost animal like as she stepped in front of Mogread.

"Oh yeah" Deannie said stepping up close so her face was millimetres from Jez's. "Try me; I could make your life make hell look like summer camp"

The pair glared at each other and the other RRA sisters knew this was going to take a long time and began to chat with the other members of Circle Daybreak. They were questioning the whereabouts of Hunter Redfern and asking what would the members of Circle Daybreak would like to do to him. After a very graphic and violent conversation with Quinn and Rashel, the girls had more ideas that would have made the Sheriff cry in horror.

"Deannie, quit your staring competition, we got a bigger fish to destroy" L.C shouted.

"I'll join you later" Deannie called back still glaring at Jez.

"Now!" Cee snapped, dragging Deannie by the collar. "This is my birthday and I want to torture Hunter Redfern as a family, not with some random members while the others are doing whatever"

"All right, all right lets go" Deannie shot one last glare at Jez. "This isn't over"

"Oh I'll be waiting" Jez taunted, hand on her hip.

NWNWNWNWNWNW

Hunter Redfern was having a nap (after all trying to destroy the world and fight Damn Daybreakers takes a lot out of you) when he was suddenly woken up by a bunch of teenage, human girls all had that passionate glint in their eyes which is good because the passionate ones taste nicer.

"Mmm dinner" he murmured leaning up to bite the nearest one.

Paula immediately screamed whacked him hard with the frying pan she was holding and hid behind Zebbie. "This is why I don't like vampires!" she said, her voice muffled by Zebbie's shoulder.

"All right, lets make his life hell for scaring Paula" L.C said glaring at Hunter with a burning hatred.

"You could always sing Happy Birthday. Your singing voice is enough to make anyone commit suicide" Josie teased.

"Oh thanks" L.C huffed.

"She's got a point though, we can actually hear you in the shower and it's enough to even make Jack depressed" Maple giggled.

"Right, I suggested we start with the skinning" Cee said pulling out a peeler.

"Sounds fun" Mira grinned evilly.

The large group then cornered Hunter as they held out their peelers prepared to strike.

"AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!"

NWNWNWNWNWNWNW

Deannie and Jez did not continue their glaring competition when Deannie got back. Hearing what had happened to Hunter Redfern, Jez had new-found respect for the girl and they were now swapping fighting tactics and torture ideas while Rashel injected a suggestion once in a while. The other girls relented and allowed the RRA full control of their soul mates, L.C, Annie and Tvnut had whisked them away giggling leaving the others to wait in the living room that was set up for a show or something.

Cee and Maggie had started to swap tips on managing their sports teams, Josie and Thea were discussing animal rights, majority of the girls surrounded Hannah asking her about her past lives and what was it like living in different time periods, Zara and Maple were bouncing round with Poppy excitedly and Gillian shyly smiled at them all while occasionally making a comment on something.

Suddenly L.C grabbed Cee and dragged her to the chair on the front row, centre. "You have to sit here because you're the birthday girl" she informed her before sitting down next to her.

The others quickly sat down, eager to see what the others had planned.

Annie came out grinning. "Ladies, in honour of our Chelle's birthday I give you the first ever Circle Daybreak strip show"

The Full Monty began playing as the boys came into the room wearing costumes like police uniform looking very uncomfortable as they began to dance very sexily.

Cee blushed heavily and sunk lower in her chair as she eyed them all up as clothes were beginning to disappear.

NWNWNWNWNWNWNW

It was quite late at night when the RRA had said their goodbyes and staggered into the TARDIS, giddy on sugar and loudly singing happy birthday to Cee for one more time.

"We should go back to Robin Hood time" Deannie said after a short, breathless silence. "I need to check on my Much"

"But first, first can we go to Vampire Diaries" Tvnut pleaded. "For my birthday"

The others quickly swapped looks and then nodded. "One Stefan Strawberry Cheesecake coming up" L.C joked as she began twirling the time rotor.

"I hope you're not the one cooking it" Soapy said alarmed.


	22. The RRA Returns: To Eat Stefan

**Author's Note: crossover with Vampire Diaries, set after the fourth book but just before the fifth one. A birthday present for Tvnut. **

It was the calm before the storm.

Stefan, with his arm wrapped firmly round a glowing Elena, Damon and Matt watching enviously behind them and Meredith and Bonnie squealing excitedly to Elena as Caroline sulked. Elena had only returned to life during the battle with Klaus and they were heading back to the boarding house where Mrs Flowers would surely give them cookies and act as if nothing ever happened. When suddenly a strange grinding sound could be heard and to everyone's shock a purple box began to appear.

"It the purple box of doom!" Stefan blurted out. "I have read about it in many texts, including the legends of Robin Hood and Merlin. Whenever it appears doom will befall you"

"Bonnie, quickly what do you sense from that box" Matt asked turning to his small redheaded friends.

"I sense great evil....and great good....great hate....great love....great honour....great justice....and great Fangirling"

"What a bunch of mixed signals" Caroline sulked.

"Fangirling?" Matt repeated. "What's Fangirling?"

"That" Meredith said nodding to a redheaded woman who stepped out of the purple box. Her eyes glittering with happiness as she let out a huge high pitched shriek.

"STEFAN! I LOVE YOU!"

She then tackled poor Stefan to the ground. More girls came out of the purple box squealing and screaming in delight. Some had even begun to use Matt as a tug of war toy claiming he was theirs. Some smacked Damon before attempting to snog him and other argued that just because it was Tvnut's birthday didn't mean she got to hog Stefan.

Poor Elena had been shoved down a ditch and unnoticed by everyone began to float up in the sky....

VDVDVDVDVDVDVDVDVDVDVD

"Tada! One Stefan Strawberry Cheesecake and I have you know that L.C did not cook it" Soapy said cheerfully, while giving L.C a teasing wink.

"I have you know, that I baked a Chocolate Mint Cheesecake one and it came out brilliantly" L.C huffed in fake anger.

"With or without your mother's help?" Josie asked innocently.

"With" L.C admitted grudgingly, her cheeks turning a faint pink as the others laughed.

"I feel a bit objectified here" Stefan said.

"Dude, you're tied to the bed naked with a cheesecake on you. A bit objectified is a bit of an understatement" Matt said sympathetically as Annie snuggled into his shoulder.

"All together now" Paula said waving her hands like a conductor. "Ha-"

"HAPPY BIRTHDAY TO YOU! HAPPY BIRTHDAY TO YOU! HAPPY BIRTHDAY TO , HAPPY BIRTHDAY TO "

Paula winced at the out of tune; tone death singing but lead the cheering before Tvnut dived down to eat the cake.

"Tvnut, you could have waited till we were out of the room!"

"ARGH! GROSS!"

"Have some decency girl!"

"Even Annie hasn't done something like that yet"

VDVDVDVDVDVDVDVDVDVDVD

"Ah, there you lot are, what are you up to?" Zebbie asked as she found Cee, L.C and Deannie surrounding Bonnie.

"We were discussing different types of reading tarot cards" L.C said brightly.

"And the consequences of seeing, knowing and feeling something bad is going to happen" Deannie added.

"And what a pain it can be when it's only us that can feel it" Cee chipped in.

"We're also playing snap, would you like a game" Bonnie asked brightly.

"Err...no, I think I'll look for Elena...she went missing after Tvnut kidnapped Stefan" Zebbie said edging away.

"Oh shit..."

"Hang on where's Caroline?"

"DIE BITCH DIE!" the fivesome watched interestedly as Voldy chased the half naked bitchy high schooler with a chainsaw. "!"

"You know...i have an urge to pull out a bag of crisps and watch" L.C drawled.

"I can't be bothered trying to save her" Bonnie said. "She was always a bitch to everyone anyway. Even if she did give Elena her dress"

Then everyone remembered.

"ELENA!"

VDVDVDVDVDVDVDVDVDVDVD

After finding Elena (much to the irritation to some clingy and possessive RRA sisters) and bringing her back. Tvnut had given Stefan a firm goodbye snog before skipping merrily into the TARDIS. Everyone gathered around the console (apart from the under sixteens due to L.C new extreme and even more evil security system) and chattered away, debating where to go next.

"Look, I made a promise to take Mel somewhere for Christmas" L.C admitted. "Let's pick her up, go there, drop her off and then gatecrash Uther's wedding in Merlin"

"YES!" Voldy screeched punching a fist into the air. "Troll stew for dinner!"

Everyone looked disgusted.

"You don't honestly expect us to eat it do you?" Vicky asked horrified.

"Nah, I was thinking of feeding it to this Freya....the bitch stole my Merlin"

Everyone rolled their eyes and listened to Voldy's rant, once more.


	23. The RRA Returns: In a Spinoff

**Author's Note: a Christmas present to my friend Mel. Also brief mentions of Maple's RRA Visits the Doctor Fic. Obviously crossover with Doctor Who. **

Lucy Saxon picked up the gun and aimed at her husband's head, when suddenly a loud and familiar grinding sound could be heard, the Master, the Doctor, Jack and Martha looked up stunned as a purple box began to materialise.

"What?!" the Doctor blurted out.

"What" the Master blinked.

"Wha..." Jack mumbled.

"For God sake, Doctor!" Martha snapped. "Stop calling yourself the Last of the Time Lords. You're obviously not!"

The door opened and a pale skinned, dark haired teenage girl dressed in blue jeans and red blouse ran out. She immediately knocked Lucy out with a large hardback book and snatched up the gun, pointing it directly at Martha. Everyone stiffened. The girl looked at the book.

"I knew I would find a use of Breaking Dawn" she grinned before chucking it away. The book unfortunately knocked the door shut just as another girl stepped out.

She raised an eyebrow. "The others won't be pleased. The lock only unlocks on the outside"

"Meh" the girl grinning manically said. "Not bothered. Right, then I got the gun so you all freeze and listen to my orders-"

"Hang on, you!" the Doctor wagged a finger at the second girl. "You're part of the RRA! You visited me in my TARDIS, made the whole timeline get all screwed up. It took months to fix!" he eyed the purple box suspiciously. "Maple isn't coming out? And the others?"

"They're trying. I'm going to be in a right shit pile when I get back in. They wanted to see you all again too" L.C said cheerfully. The Doctor sighed in relief, while engaging and enjoyable company they were, Maple had one too many times ruined his TARDIS console in her experiments. "Right, this is one of my best friends Mel, she wanted something amazing for Christmas so I'm giving her this"

"You!" Mel pointed the gun at Jack. "Go back in your cell and don't bother coming back...ever"

"Going to visit me in your school uniform?" Jack asked flirtatiously, eyeing Mel up with interest.

Mel immediately shot Jack. "Err, no" she said. "Right you, Martha. Bugger off and get a shower, you stink"

Martha eyed Mel suspiciously. "Hang on, weren't you the one, who followed me everywhere in the past year throwing rotten eggs at me?"

Mel looked innocent. "Moi? Would I do such a thing to an annoying, snobby and whiney character that irritated me throughout the whole series?"

"Yes" everyone said in a deadpan voice.

"Especially when you put it like that" L.C added.

"Meh" Mel shrugged and then pointed the gun at the Doctor. "You, Hamster on Legs, go back to the corner and be all Emo"

"Mel! He is not a hamster, he's Sex on Legs" L.C shouted.

"Hamster"

"Sex"

"Hamster"

"Sex"

"Hamster"

"Sex"

"Hamster"

"Sex"

"Hamster"

"Sex"

"Hamster"

"Sex"

"Ham-"

"Will you two quit fighting!" the Doctor shouted, looking bright red. "It's very embarrassing and childish"

"Oh, please go on, I was having fun with all the chaos" the Master pouted. "I like this Mel one, not keen on the L.C too much of a Doctor fan for my liking"

Mel beamed happily; she then held the gun at the Master. "My next order is that you have to snog me, make me your queen and we'll listen to the drums for all our lives"

L.C coughed loudly.

"All right just for Christmas" Mel said grudgingly, shooting L.C an evil glare.

The Master grinned. "My pleasure" he said striding towards Mel and dipping her into a long, steamy snog that caused everyone in the room to gag. He then pulled a remote up and turned on some upbeat music before he danced Mel across the room.

"I'm so depressed" Jack said sitting up. "It's Christmas, I don't have my mistletoe and I have no Christmas shag"

The Doctor quickly went to his corner to look depress, L.C pulled out a carving knife threateningly and Martha looked a bit eager.

Mel and the Master immediately stomped on Jack as they continued to dance. Mel cackling away. "Merry Christmas, to me!" she shouted.


	24. The RRA Returns: To Make Stew

**Author Note: a Christmas present to Voldy who has written all RRA visit Merlin fics and really wanted one to figure in this fic. So obviously a crossover with Merlin, R&R**

The priest was droning Arthur and Morgana shifted uncomfortably in their formal clothing as they watched their king and father (father figure in Morgana's case) marry a beautiful young woman not much older than themselves. Gaius kept glancing at the door waiting for Merlin to interrupt with his spell to reveal the woman's true identity.

"If any of you object, speak now or forever hold your peace"

A moment of silence. Merlin still hadn't appeared and Gaius inwardly screamed his objections and begged the gods above to save Uther from the Troll's enchantment when suddenly an even more horrifying sound and sight appeared. The strange foreign scraping sound as a magic purple box appeared...

And immediately squashed the priest.

Uther looked slightly baffled but instantly met Katrina's eyes and sighed blissfully. Yes Uther is definitely enchanted, after the last time the purple box appeared the King had almost died of a heart attack with the torture, mental, emotional and physical that had been inflicted on all of the inhabitants. Arthur looked horrified and immediately ducked down and hid behind Morgana's skirts. The door opened and Voldy appeared grinning.

"I object!" she said, she glanced round. "Where's the priest dude?" the head of the royal guarded nodded to underneath the TARDIS' and Voldy's eyes widened. "Oh...L.C YOU PLONKER YOU LANDED ON THE PRIEST!"

"ME! YOU WERE HELPING ME DRIVE; YOU CAN TAKE PART OF THE BLAME!"

"I'm glad you can make it to my wedding, Lady Voldy" Uther said dreamily.

Voldy looked disgusted. "With that ugly thing, dear god you are enchanted. Hold on a minute" she punched right into the ruby of Uther's necklace, smashing it to bits, stunned the King fainted. "Hey girls, who fancies troll stew?"

"EWWWWWWWWWW"

"Yuck, no thanks"

"I rather eat L.C's cooking"

"I didn't mean for us, I was thinking for certain little bastards like the Master, the Sheriff, Gisbourne, Isabella" Voldy said.

"Ooh, nice idea, yeah go on then" a large group of girls came out and dragged Katrina screaming into the purple box, Gaius was actually beginning to feel sorry for the manipulating, disgusting Troll when Merlin burst through the door.

"Merlin, baby!" Voldy squealed Merlin stepped back, paling incredibly.

"V-V-Voldy" he stuttered. "What are you doing here?"

"Doing your job since you're an idiot" Voldy said flinging her arms round his neck and wrapping something round his shoulders. "My Christmas present to you" she murmured against his lips before running off. "L.C won't shut up about how you need an invisible spell, so I stole this from Harry Potter's world-"

"Harry Potter?"

"A great wizard, well so they say but I find him a little too wimpy if you ask me. But they worship Merlin and Morgana as fantastic wizards. Anyway, before you die bury it at this place" Voldy threw a map at Merlin. "So Harry will find it, bye, bye I need to start cooking. I got a Christmas dinner consisting of Troll stew to serve to some very _special _people"

Voldy then skipped off and the purple box vanished.

Everyone stood in silence; Arthur shot up and puffed his chest out. "Well that wasn't too bad" he said.

"What are you talking about?" Morgana asked. "You were too busy cowering behind my skirts, you prat"

"OH MY GOD, MERLIN YOU'RE HALF INVISIBLE!"


	25. The RRA Returns: To Kidnap Tuck

**Author's Note: finally we are back to Robin Hood but not as you know it as I give Tvnut her very much desired Christmas present. Merry Christmas Tvnut. **

Mira woke up to a baby crying. Groaning, she turned round and buried herself into her pillow, clinging to her panda bear. "Shut up" she moaned snuggling under her covers.

The baby's cries only got louder.

Frustrated, Mira flung her covers off and marched out of her room. Outside she found her RRA sisters in similar tired states, half-dressed and in pjs while yawning.

"What on earth is going on?" Josie asked.

"I dunno but I was having a yummy dream about Eric when suddenly I was rudely woken up" Annie said tying up her silk dressing gown. "It better not be another invasion or intruder, I might just torture them all by myself"

"Oh please, like I would give you the chance" Maple snorted. "No one disrupts my sleep and get away with it"

"The noise seems to be coming from L.C's room" Zara said worriedly. "You don't think the Sheriff tried to kidnap her again do you?"

Everyone exchanged disbelieved looks. "After the last time?" Zebbie said. "No way in hell is anyone _that _stupid"

"L.C is probably just torturing some poor sod, let's just go in, ask her to quit it and go back to sleep" Deannie said marching towards L.C's door, the others following in a similar determined way. Throwing the door open, Deannie began to shout, "ALL RIGHT, WHAT....bloody hell....did you kidnap that?"

Everyone looked in with horror as they watched L.C attempt to change a small black baby's nappy.

"I can explain" L.C said, wiping talcum powder on her cheek by mistake.

"You better" Cee growled.

RHRHRHRHRHRHRHRHRHRHRH

"Right let me get this straight" Foxy said pushing her hair back out from her face. "That baby, is Brother Tuck"

"Yes"

"You kidnapped him before he found God so Tvnut could have him as a Christmas present"

"Yes"

"Knowing full well that you'll be messing with time?"

L.C smiled mysteriously. "I have a plan"

"I'm not sure I want to know" Foxy mumbled. "But please for the love of God raise that baby somewhere else! We need sleep!"

"I have an idea!" Maple said sitting up suddenly from her sleeping position at the kitchen table, drool sticking to her chin. "I shall force grow him in my growing machine!"

"You have a growing machine?!" Josie yelped.

"Dear God I'm going to need to change the security system again" L.C mumbled.

"Err...sister dear, you have drool, just right there" Lollzie said handing Maple a tissue.

RHRHRHRHRHRHRHRHRH

All the RRA girls were thankful that the growing machine worked. They had a full night of sleep and slept in before breakfast provided by Brother Tuck. It appeared Maple had used some sort of personality transplant machine since he acted like himself without his faith in God.

"Where's Tvnut?" Vicky asked her mouth full of pancake.

"With her parents, I thought it was the best time to do it now" L.C said sipping her orange juice. "Shall we go and get her after this?"

"Yeah, she'll be shocked...or ecstatic"

"Hmm...Or horny, I know I would be if it was Eric" Annie said dreamily.

"Please not at the table" L.C said calmly as she patted a choking Josie on the back.

RHRHRHRHRHRHRHRHRH

"AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH I LOVE HIM! THANK YOU SO MUCH!" Tvnut screamed hugging Tuck tightly round the neck in an almost chokehold. "Best Christmas present ever!"

"Yeah....just try not to kill him" L.C said worriedly as Tuck turned an interesting shade of blue.

"Seeing Tuck and Tvnut happy together makes me miss Much" Deannie said sighing. "Let's go back to Nottingham"

"Yeah! Archer here I come!" Voldy cheered.

"And Allan" Mira added.

"Not to mention Guy" Cee said dreamily.

"All right, all right we'll go to Nottingham" L.C said as she and her other sisters began to fiddle with the console, Maple, Mira and Lollzie sat there glaring and sulking since they were still not allowed to drive the TARDIS.

RHRHRHRHRHRHRHRHRH

Nottingham was not the same. The Sherwood Forest was burnt to the ground, gravestones filled the wasteland and many women were found crying.

"L.C....you didn't get the wrong time...again?" Zebbie asked nervously.

"No....i don't think so....look there's Kate!" L.C said pointing to a ragged blonde woman who was crying. "Kate, Kate what happened?"

Kate looked up and eyed them with suspicion. "Who the hell are you?"

"Eh?!"

All the girls were gobsmacked, never before had anyone ever forgot about them....unless....unless time got messed up....again.

"Friends...of Robin Hood" Mira whispered to Kate.

"Friends of a dead man. How very nice" Kate said sarcastically. "Don't pull my leg everyone knows that Robin died that day Guy threw him off the cliff into the stream"

Horrified gasps could be heard, Maple let out a whimper before bursting into tears, Lollzie moved to comfort her other third.

"What...what about Much?" Deannie asked licking her lips nervously.

"The sidekick? Committed suicide I believe" Kate said dismissively. "Then Allan died in a bar fight, Little John went mental and got executed by the Sheriff and hell has been unleashed upon us ever since"

"And Guy of Gisbourne?"

"The greasy bastard? He's over there busy being evil" Kate said pointing to the dark, greasy haired man sitting on the horse laughing manically.

L.C rubbed her eyes. "I've been reading too much manga" she muttered.

"LET ME AT HIM!" Maple roared charging towards Guy,

"MAPLE NO!" Cee tackled her younger RRA sister to the ground and the pair of them began to wrestle one another.

Sighing, the elder sisters knocked both of them out with the hardest hardback books they had with them. Mysty, Lolly, Lollzie, Foxy and Zebbie then dragged Cee and Maple back into the TARDIS.

"What are we going to do?" Annie asked. "What we were fighting for is dead"

"Well...we were fighting for a dead woman in the first place, so nothing really has change" Vicky said trying to lighten the situation.

"We are going to return Tuck back to his rightful place so the world can go back to normal" Mira said forcefully, taking up her rightful role as leader of the group.

"NO!" Tvnut wailed clinging to Tuck.

"I'm sorry Tvnut but it has to be done"

"I'll fight you if I have to" Tvnut said defiantly.

"All right" Deannie said grinning evilly. The others surrounded Tvnut and tackled her to the ground. "Just remember it's eleven against one"

RHRHRHRHRHRHRHRH

After the others left to the TARDIS preparing for their journey to return Tuck to his rightful place, L.C turned to Guy and Kate, passing them two large bags of gold.

"You did a fabulous job" she said gratefully. "A bit too clichéd on the evilness but fab none the less. I'll return you back to your time later; first I need to sort out everyone else"

"You better" Guy muttered. "I hate living in Hollywood, nothing makes sense and I almost get knocked over by these inventions called cars"

"It's a bit mean to tease your friend though" Kate said scornfully.

"Yeah, well I'll make it up to her" L.C said grinning. "I cloned Tuck last night, so on Christmas day she should wake up to find a very naked kinky monk under the tree"

Guy and Kate shuddered horrified at the mental image.


	26. The RRA Returns: St Trinian's

**Author's Note: a crossover with the second St Trinian's film. Also a Christmas present to Zara, please R&R. **

_Make us worthy, make us proud  
Teach us not to be too loud  
We'll try to fit in with the crowd  
But we are St Trinian's_

_We can't fake the way we feel  
We were born to keep it real  
Hockey sticks and balls of steel  
We are St Trinian's_

_You bite us, we'll bite you back  
Better be scared when we attack  
Feel the fear, we're maniacs  
St Trinian's_

It was a normal chaotic day in St Trinian's as explosions left, right and Maths class could be heard. Miss Frittion and her niece Annabelle were enjoying a cup of tea (with a sneaky whiskey in Miss Frittion's mug) when a loud, strange scarping noise could be heard. Unfazed both women took a biscuit when a purple box suddenly appeared out of nowhere and the door opened to reveal a gang of teenage girls. Most of them looked very similar with brown hair and glasses causing Annabelle to instantly put them in the Geek category in her mind.

"Hello, we're the RRA we like explosions, violence, fandoms and punishing men!" Mira said cheerfully.

"And glitter, lots and lots of glitter" Zara injected.

"And chocolate!" L.C added.

"So can we please study at your school?" Maple concluded with puppy dog eyes.

Miss Frittion sat there thoughtfully. "I can't see why not" she said finally. "You all seem like engaging young ladies"

The group left screaming hysterically in sheer happiness.

"Auntie, I have a bad feeling about this" Annabelle said.

"Nonsense, they seem like fine girls!"

_Check out our battle cry  
a song to terrify  
No one can stand in our way_

A loud explosion could be heard; it was more powerful than the one before and sent a large chunk of wall and windows flying into the field.

Miss Frittion smiled. "See they're fitting in already" Annabelle merely gulped.

_We are the best, so screw the rest  
We do as we damn well please  
Until the end  
St Trinian's  
Defenders of anarchy_

_So scan all the toffs, the neats and the freaks  
Blackmail the Goths, the slappers and the geeks  
And if they complain, we'll do it all again  
We do as we damn well please_

_The ASBOs, the chavs, the emos and their mates  
To torment the slags, we offer special rates  
And if they complain, we'll do it all again  
Defenders of anarchy_

After several explosive days as students of St Trinian's, the RRA sisters were settling in well despite their exhaustion of battling an evil noble who's intent on ruining the Frittions due to an old feud. Their first night consisted off throwing Voldy's magical potions at the soldiers in black turning them into anything from a peacock to a ferret while Zara, Maple and Lollzie had not only beaten some of them up into a pulp but decorated them with glitter and strung them up on the ceiling as Christmas decorations (not considering the fact it was actually still September in this world).

The small sense of quietness while hunting down clues had been broken when the elder girls brought Annabelle in the hospital wing possessed by a ghost of one of her ancestors. The ghost was acting like the one in Scary Movie Two.

"We're going to have to exorcise her!" the eldest emo girl said.

"Exercise her?" the eldest bimbo repeated.

"No exorcise, get rid of the ghost, cleanse Annabelle's body from all evil, yada, yada, yada" Deannie said rolling her eyes at the bimbo's sheer stupidity.

"I'll get the chicken blood and candles" L.C and Voldy said in unison remembering the Mediator series by Meg Cabot.

"NO!" Deannie and Cee screamed.

"You don't mess with that stuff, ever" Deannie said sternly. "We'll have the threaten the ghost, capture it and then put it through some severe questioning"

"How do we do that?" Paula asked biting her lip.

"Mr Ghost" Zara said innocently, battering her eyelashes. "If you don't leave your descendant's body, I will be forced to hack your balls off, glue glitter to them and hang them on the RRA Christmas tree"

The ghost left without any complaints. _  
_

_  
We are the best, so screw the rest  
we do as we damn well please  
until the end  
St Trinian's  
Defenders of anarchy  
ST TRINIAN'S!_

_So scan all the toffs, the neats and the freaks  
Blackmail the Goths, the slappers and the geeks  
And if they complain, we'll do it all again  
We do as we damn well please_

_The ASBOs, the chavs, the emos and their mates  
To torment the slags, we offer special rates  
And if they complain, we'll do it all again  
Defenders of anarchy_

It was a meeting of the ADHG, the leader David Tenant – I mean Sir Pierce Pomphrey was sitting at the head of the table in his long dark purple and black robes watching his secret society drink out of the sacred goblet when suddenly a dark purple box appeared out of thin air and a group of girls from St Trinian's marched out.

"EEK! GIRLS!" one of the men shouted ducking under the table.

"Wuss" Voldy muttered to her sister who nodded in agreement.

"Right we're here for Pierce Poppycock!" Zara said cheerfully.

"Err...Zarry-babes its Pomphrey"

"Poopy"

"Pomphrey!" David Ten- err PP said.

"Poppity-poop"

"Pomphrey!"

"Poppets!"

"Pomphrey-"

"Look" L.C said sighing, "we could be here all day, let's just grab David Tenant submit him to torture and get some chocolate on the go"

"Who on earth is this David Tenant?" Pierce demanded. "Listen here, you stupid school girls the bunch of you are worthless, brainless bimbos who don't deserve the education you're given. Your place is either in the bedroom or in the kitchen"

"Oh, no he didn't" Cee growled glaring at the David Tenant look a like.

"Oh, yes he did" Maple grumbled.

"Get him girls" Mira ordered.

Before anyone could say something Zara snatched up the large golden goblet and used it to knock out the David Tenant look a like while the other girls quickly attacked the other members, effectively knocking them out before rounding onto the unconscious form of the David Tenant look a like.

"This is going to be fun" Zebbie snickered.

"Please no visible marks, I want to keep him as a slave" L.C said.

"Ooh kinky" Annie teased.

"Well who wouldn't? It's David Tenant, Scottish accent and all" Deannie drooled.

_Check out our battle cry  
a song to terrify  
No one can stand in our way_

_we are the best, so screw the rest  
we do as we damn well please  
until the end  
St Trinian's  
Defenders of anarchy_

_Victorious, rebellious  
we do as we damn well please  
until the end  
St Trinian's_

"Well girls I must say you did a splendid job" Miss Frittion said clinging to her new puppy. "That Pomphrey git is subdued, Jeffery is being...well Jeffery, Annabelle has gotten some more confidence and the world now knows that Shakespeare is in fact a woman"

"Yeah I still can't get my head round that one" Lolly muttered.

"I know! Who would have thought a man with a sexual appetite to match Jack Harkness was in fact a woman" Foxy shuddered.

"I dunno Annie has a sexual appetite to match Jack's, so it can't be that bad" Josie said with a shrug.

"Oi! I am not that bad" Annie said smacking Josie in the shoulder.

"Oh yeah?" L.C challenged. "I know for well that Eric will be chained to your bed in a black silk robe"

"URGH, L.C THAT'S AN IMAGE WE HAVE NO NEED OFF!!!"

"Says the girl that has a David Tenant look a like on a leash" Annie shot back ignoring her sisters' screams of disgust.

Everyone looked down at the floor where Pierce Pomphrey was leaning against L.C's leg shirtless while wearing a black dog collar.

"It's David Tenant" Deannie said. "Who wouldn't?"

"Now girls, I don't want to sound doubtful or anything, but are you sure you can keep this man under control?" Miss Frittion asked worriedly.

"Don't worry, we already put him through all torture we could think off and the brainwashing machine" Maple said cheerfully.

"Yes, what are women to you, David?" Tvnut asked.

"Women are goddesses they are to be worshipped and pampered as if they are royalty" Pierce said in a slow drowsy voice.

"And men?"

"Well they're for making cakes and babies" he said smiling charmingly.

It took a lot of control for the RRA girls to NOT swoon. "Well, we got to go, as much as we enjoy staying here in St Trinian's we're needed elsewhere" Mira said.

"Bye!" the RRA girls and St Trinian's students called out to one another.

"Do visit again!" Miss Frittion called out.

As the purple box slammed shut and slowly began to fade away a familiar song could be heard.

_  
Defenders of anarchy  
RRA FOREVER!_

"Hey! They nicked our song!"

_Don't let the bastards get you down!_


	27. The RRA Returns: For Love and Justice

**Author's note: a crossover with Sailor Moon **

"I've been thinking" L.C announced looking up from her book to the other RRA sisters all who were in various positions reading.

"Uh-oh we're doomed" Josie said shutting her book. "I would like to be buried with my Noughts and Crosses series please"

L.C rolled her eyes. "Be serious, anyway-"

"I was being serious!"

"ANYWAY! I've decided that I'm sick of being the only one who knows about anime and manga, so I'm now going to take you on a tour of different fandoms" L.C declared.

"All right" Deannie shrugged. "I was getting bored anyway"

"Erm....L.C tends to get really insane ideas from her anime. Remember the teddy bear army?" the girls shuddered but then went starry eyed at the memory of the cuteness....and then they remembered how vicious the teddies were and shuddered again. "Do you really think we should encourage it?" Lolly asked.

"Should we encourage Maple to create even more torture in the name of science?" Deannie shot back. "Come on, it's not going to do us any harm"

"Yay!" L.C said. "I thought we would do Sailor Moon first, since some of you already know that one"

"Fighting evil by moonlight, winning love by daylight, never running from a real fight, she is the one named Sailor Moon" the girls sang as they ran into the console room.

SMSMSMSMSMSMSMSMSMSM

Sailor Moon was just about the moon dust the youma when suddenly a purple box landed on top of it, squashing it to death and causing her fellow sailor scouts to scream in horror as green slime splattered all over them. The door opened and several girls dressed in jeans came out.

"L.C you landed on someone again!" Paula shouted in shock.

"And she's the one that gets to drive? Unfair" Maple pouted.

"Life generally isn't" L.C said. "And don't go pretending that you haven't been overriding my system. I still haven't worked out how you got past the lava"

Maple merely smirked and turned round to face the scouts. "Hello, we're the RRA and you must be the sailor scouts"

The sailor scouts nodded dumbly.

"Sailor Moon, also known as Usagi" L.C said introducing a gobsmacked tiny blonde who was wearing pink, blue and white costume. "Sailor Mercury is Ami, local genius" Ami was a blue haired girl in matching blue costume that looked like she wanted to run away. "Sailor Mars is Rei who's a bit of a bitch-"

"Excuse me?!"

"Makoto is Sailor Jupiter, Minako is Venus, Haruka is Uranus, Hotaru is Saturn, Michiru is Neptune and last but not least Setsuna is Pluto" L.C said hurriedly as she ignored Rei's shouts and the small pink haired girl.

"That's not their names!" Zebbie exclaimed.

"Yes it is" Haruka said glaring. The RRA glared back un-intimidated though slightly impressed, Haruka would make a wonderful addition to the group.

"It's their Japanese names, you know them better as Serena, Amy, Raye, Lita, Mina, Amara, Michelle, Hotaru and Trista" L.C explained. "Tuxedo Mask, is known as Tuxedo Kamen or Mamoru instead of Darien"

"And the pink sprog?" Cee asked disliking Chibi-Usa's hair.

"Chibi-Usa, Sailor Mini-Moon, Rini, pain in the arse who fancies her father"

"EW!"

"I reckon we should teach her a lesson, after all she was constantly spiteful to Serena" Deannie said glaring at the little brat who edged away from the RRA.

"I just want to get rid off that awful hair" Cee said.

"LET'S GET HER!"

Within an hour the sailor scouts were nursing their wounds received by the RRA while Chibi-Usa was hanging upside down on a tree with a dark brown Mohawk looking disgusted as Paula finished reading the Boeism bible to her. The other girls had gotten bored after they pulled every hair off Chibi-Usa's legs with tweezers and glued her feet together with glitter glue so they had decided to leave Paula to do the sex education using Jack Harkness' work. Meanwhile Zebbie and L.C had gotten into a tug of war fight involving Tuxedo Mask.

"My Tuxedo Mask!"

"No, my Tuxedo Mask!"

"Mine!"

"Mine!"

"Oh come on Zebbie! You can have his best friend, Andrew or Motoki or whatever he goes by these days!"

"Why don't you?"

"Because Tuxedo Mask is sexier, he reminds me a lot of Jesse!"

"Same here!"

"Ooh, could we have a three-way share on him too?" Voldy said interrupting the argument. The other two exchanged looks and shrugged both letting go of Tuxedo Mask who fell in a puddle of mud they hugged.

"Let's share him!" they declared in a cheerful unison.

"Mamo-Chan! Are you all right?" Usagi asked running to her abused boyfriend.

The next few days were spent fighting creepy perverted, Jack's type, monsters while tormenting Usagi's little brother, teacher, friends and boyfriend. They had also been teaching sweet cry-baby Usagi to be tougher and more violent, to their pleasure she had slapped Rei and beat the crap out of one of the monsters. Eventually they got bored, especially when Zara scared off Pegasus with her constant glittering.

" let me keep her!" L.C begged looking up with puppy-eyes. "I promise I'll feed her, cuddle her, and empty her litter and so on"

"L.C you can't just steal someone's cat" Tvnut said sternly as Josie gently took Luna out of L.C's arms and gave her back to Usagi. "Especially an annoying nagging one who'll never shut up unless we gag her"

"Well I never!" Luna huffed.

"Come on L.C show us another Anime/Manga world before we end up having all the cats trying to scratch our eyes out" Lollzie said before whipping around to face Deannie. "And put Artemis down Deannie! He maybe less of a nag compared to Luna but he's still not our talking cat!"

"Bugger" Deannie grumbled dropping the white cat.


	28. The RRA Returns: To Dress Up

**Author's Note: a crossover with Cardcaptor Sakura**

A girl with short brown hair and sparkling green eyes looked uncomfortable as her best friend encouraged her to pose in front of the camera in a new extravagant costume. The grumbled complaints and gentle coxing of the two girls had been interrupted by a loud grating sound; the pair whirled round to see a purple box appearing out of thing air.

"HOE!" the brown haired girl shouted.

The door opened and many girls spilled out, all wearing jeans and t-shirts that looked completely normal compared to Sakura's hooped skirt with frills.

"Welcome to Cardcaptor Sakura" the one with the messy bob and glasses said. "Over there is Sakura and Tomoyo"

"Creepy outfit" one of them muttered nodding to Sakura's dress causing her to blush.

"I'm sorry but please do not be so disrespectful about my designs" Tomoyo said politely though there was an evil glint in her eyes. "I worked very hard to make Sakura cute and you all look very pretty and would be very interesting projects for me"

Some of them gulped. "Bloody hell she should be one of us!" Foxy said admiringly.

"Oh my god how cute is this!" Zara squealed pulling a yellow flying teddy out of the air and strangling the poor thing to her chest.

"That's Kero, guardian of the Clow Card book" L.C explained looking concerned for the poor yellow creature's welfare. "I would be careful if I were you, he could transform into a giant lion"

Zara immediately let go and Kero took great big breaths. "You insane girl! Who do you think you are strangling me like that before I even got my last cake?"

Some of them raised their eyebrows at the fuming teddy and others giggled. "Kero likes his sweets" Sakura explained.

"My new best friend! I'll treat you too some chocolate right now if you let me cuddle you" Zara said temptingly.

"All right" Kero said punching a paw up in the air before sitting himself on Zara's shoulder. "Lead the way all mighty best friend"

CCSCCSCCSCCSCCSCCSCCSCCSCCS

"He's so gorgeous" Annie sighed as she sipped her milkshake. "It's a shame he's gay"

"I know but gay couples do seem to be very attractive" Zebbie said mournfully. "I mean look at Jack and Ianto"

"But this is so more loving than Janto!" L.C exclaimed.

"What does that mean?!" Josie glared, feeling protective over her favourite ship. "Janto is a lot better than bloody Gwack!"

"Janto is just pure sex" L.C said calmly. "Hot sex but sex nonetheless. Yukito and Toya have something stronger than sexual attraction. They have a strong friendship built on trust and a deep loving relationship that goes to the point where Toya was willing to give up his magic to Yue so Yukito will live! Toya gave up the only tool he had to protect his precious little sister. Toya and Yukito are far more romantic than Jack and Ianto!"

"She's got a point, that's sounds so sweet" Paula said feeling a little watery in the eyes. "I wish I had a Yukito or a Toya for me!"

"I just want to shag Toya" Annie said causing her sisters to roll their eyes.

Suddenly a small black cat with wings flew past them screaming in delight and excitement.

"What the bloody hell was that?!" Voldy shouted jumping up.

"That was Suppi on a sugar high" L.C said watching the black cat in amusement. "His full name is Spinel Sun, he's just like Kero only a little more grumpy and serious....and more affected by sugar"

"He's acting just like Zara on a hype!" Deannie said ducking to avoid the dive bombing black cat.

"Speaking of Zara where is she and Maple?"

As by magic one by one, the RRA collapsed onto the cold cafe floor or bashing their head against the table into a deep sleep.

"Urgh...." Mira moaned struggling to wake up.

"Argh!" Cee screamed causing some of the sisters to sit upright immediately. "I'm in pink!"

"Ew so am I!" Voldy screeched pulling at her incredibly frilly skirt.

"Is it me or am I wearing a wig?" Josie asked pulling at her new blonde hair.

"It's not just you. You look like a gothic Alice in Wonderland" Vicky said enviously as she yanked at her bunny ears. "Wish I could say the same for me"

"Smile for the camera" Maple giggled running around with a digital camera, snapping photos of each and everyone of the RRA in her girly extravagant costumes. "You all look so adorable"

"I'm going to make you wish you were never born" Josie growled.

"No you won't, you love me too much" Maple said battering her eyelashes.

"That and you have way too many weapons up your sleeve" Zara said grinning as she took her own photos as well. "Just so you know...Tomoyo is filming this right now"

"Ohohohohohohohohohohoho" Tomoyo giggled. "You all look so CUTE! I think I have died and gone to cute girl heaven!"

Some of the RRA girls now felt like they were being objectified by Jack Harkness, Torchwood's local pervert. Others just sighed and allowed themselves to be filmed while secretly plotting to hide all of Maple's and Zara's glitter collection.

"It's not fair!" Lollzie pouted as she ripped off her giant bow of her head. "I really wanted to meet Eriol and Syaoran before we left. Even this insane Ruby Moon L.C mentioned, she sounded like obsessive fangirl material"

"We'll meet Syaoran when we go to Tsubasa Chronicle world" L.C promised tugging at her skirt that felt far too short for her liking. "Although I have to admit the Tsubasa version is more polite and less grumpy that the Cardcaptor version"

"I don't get how they're the same people yet different" Soapy said.

L.C opened her mouth to explain but Cee cut in. "Let's not go into it, all this pink is giving me a headache as it is. Let's burn these clothes, shower, dress in normal clothes and then destroy all evidence of us in pink"

Zara and Maple looked innocent.

"What have you done?" Deannie growled.

"We may or may not have emailed it to all of your parents" Zara said sweetly.

"Get them" Mira ordered.


End file.
